By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
We can always count on you to tell us how you feel without beating around the bush. I love it!
Then, I might tell her to call a few caregiver agencies to help out in the interim and wish her luck on finding a new permanent caregiver. Or you could suggest placement in a facility for her mom.
Be honest with yourself too. You know that you don’t want to be in this situation anymore. It wouldn’t end well if you caved in to your ex partner’s request.
You don’t owe her anything, not even an explanation if you don’t want to go into detail. I think that you are feeling empathy for your ex in this situation, not necessarily guilt.
You’re not talking about a child who deserves love from both parents. She can hire someone to help with caring for her mom.
Talking about, dealing with, my MIL is the ONE THING that keeps me and my DH apart, emotionally and physically and mentally. He puts her first and I feel it, and know it--and know why--but it's very hard to be the last person on the list.
I do not, and will not, help in the physical care of my MIL. I walked out 4 years ago and have not and will not go back.
Do NOT walk back in to that.
Esp if MIL knows you're splitting up. While that would thrill MY MIL to pieces, it would come at such a cost.
Perhaps MIL could go in respite care while your ex takes some personal time and finds her a home.
I know this must be a tough decision to make.
1) You do not have to help at all . You can tell your partner you are sorry she’s overwhelmed but she will have to find another solution.
2) You can help by running some errands and dropping off some food for a limited time , but you are not obligated to do anything .
3) OR…..If you are looking for reconciliation you could offer to help with a hard deadline of her placing her mother in a facility . And by help, you should not do the hands on caregiving . You could come over and make some meals , do some cleaning and laundry, errands , grocery shopping .
Explain that it is not a good idea for you to do any hands on caregiving considering how you were treated . Don’t be left alone with this woman . You don’t need her accusing you of anything .
See All Answers