By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
We may be selling my parents' house in the foreseeable future. My parents seem to be resigned to the house being sold, we've talked about it. I just wish they downsized years ago and did not leave this to us. Let's pile this on to everything else I am dealing with right now.
Cleaning this house out will be a massive task, it's daunting. My parents lived in that house since 1962 so there's lotsa stuff.
I agree with whomever said you probably instinctively knew which path to take with her.
Even though she bought the house long after I was an adult and I never lived in it, cleaning it out was so hard. She was fairly minimalist, so I didn’t face the chaos so many here do, but she was everywhere in the house. Even my dog and my cat and her cat are buried there. I grieved endlessly. People were all cheerful and let’s get ‘er done, and I’d go in dragging my feet up the steps like a 3 year old sent to bed after being told Santa was a filthy lie. I told myself it was hard and sad, it was supposed to be hard and sad because I love her, but hard and sad don’t last if I let the emotions in and processed them.
Best wishes as you go through this difficult time.
Not being truthful to people with dementia is fine. In fact many times it's more of a kindness than a lie.
Tell her she still has a house. Tell her whatever makes her happy at this point.
Letting our family home go was much harder for me (and my brother) than it was for her. Within a few weeks she had no memory of it after living there 50 years.
I would do what keeps your mom happy and calm. That is your highest priority now.
You’re absolutely right to feel that it may have been difficult for her to hear the truth.
Your assessment of her not being able to fully understand what is going on is correct.
I realize that you feel badly about not being able to be completely honest with your mom. That’s natural because it isn’t in your make up to intentionally deceive others.
There are always going to be conflicting emotions as we continue on in our caregiving journey. I know that I felt a range of emotions when I was caregiving for my parents.
Wishing you peace through this challenging time in your life.