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This allowed my father (her primary caregiver) to get her on the toilet as fast as he realized she needed to go. Also it was easier to wash the sweatpants or even discard them because they were not expensive.
Your mother may be squatting anywhere in the house because in her mind she is an infant and that was what she did before she was potty trained. If this is the case, you will have to try to modify this behavior in the same way you would do potty training for a toddler. Take her to the bathroom every half hour and get her to pull down her pants and sit on the toilet for at least 5 minutes. Sometimes she will go. Praise and reward her with a hug when she does. When she does not go, let her get off, pull up her pants and go back to what she was doing before. Keep this up all day for a couple of days until she starts to go on her own. But do not get angry with her when she reverts back. Just start the reinforcement again--always with loving kindness.
2nd if you can schedule times to change her every three to four hours or less even if she does not have to go.
If you can sit her on the potty try turning the faucet on and let the water run down the sink so she can hear it
this may help her go. 3rd if you can find a way to cover things that can't be replaced because accidents are
going to happen. On the part she knows what she is doing well take it from somebody who worked in Nursing
Homes for years she really doesn't know what she is doing it but it way seem that way. Good Luck!!!
Sorry for all of you dealing with this, but, it is what it is. Your loved one is now incontinent, it may start out as occasional, but that is only short lived & a term, per a physician, that shouldn't even be used. They may get 1 & 2 in the toilet sometimes, other times everywhere & anywhere. There are too many steps for your loved to remember if nature calls these days, so, clothes may come off or not. A window sill, shower stall, or chair may look like a toilet. They may not even be sure what #2 is anymore, so, they may touch it, then want it off, so, on it will go to another place.
Whatever your preferred term, ALZ, dementia or memory impaired this is the real cause. Trying to reason or threaten with repercussions will not work. Depending on your loved one's cognitive your words may make things worse. You may cause shame, sadness or agitation & behavior concerns. This isn't a cookie cutter disease, so, who knows your outcome, but it is a battle you won't win.
The Depends is a must & make them become the "new underwear." Get the "jockeys" out of the house & no turning back.
Your choice on a long term solution is a personal one. It's either you're it, hope for instincts to kick in; you hire 24/7 help for your dad, experienced & knowledgeable; or you look for a facility. This is a tough part of caregiving & will get worse as the disease progresses. Many caregivers make a choice at this time because caregiving can & may become a full time job. It is physically & mentally draining.
All of us have to remember, thru the trials & tribulations, to not forget dignity & respect. Empathy & compassion is a must as well. If you love & care you find yourself becoming a voice for your loved one, it just happens. Stay strong & focused, trust your gut on decision making.
Blessings🌸
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