By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
1. You can go to court to and have your Dad legally declared incompetent.
2. It's Dad's money not your inheritance..He can spend it as he wants on who he wants...
Sorry, you do not get a vote in whom dad sees, or how he spends his money. He has the right to spend it. Whatever is left over will be your inheritance, unless he sees fit to provide for someone else instead.
Deathbed promises are emotional, caring and loving, but not legally binding.
Think fondly of your mother and be grateful dad is happy and has a life and is not sucking the air out of yours by wanting constant attention.
Back off, let the girlfriend care for him when he's sick, keep in touch and enjoy him when you visit. Your husband should be your main priority. If this continues you will probably lose him to someone who's prepared to be home, not always on the road, and isn't obsessed with an inheritance. Only you can decide where your priorities lie.
My father was deliriously happy, wife #3 was a twin for Grace Kelly, with grace and charm that turned every man's head when she entered the room. For twenty five years she made sure that 3 meals a day were promptly on time, the shirts were ironed, his underwear was spotless and his coffee was hot. She was not a good nurse, too squeamish, not fond of grandchildren racing around, but she was intelligent and articulate. They would argue. She would win.
At age 83 my father dropped dead. I pulled out his Will. She was terrified, and I told her "It's all yours. You get everything." As it should be.
First of all give your self a big hug from all of us.
Take several very deep breaths and go from there.
Every persons back ground is readily available now on the internet. Now I am not jn agreement with this information being public BUT in your case I would start digging and find out everything you can about this person.It is just possible there is something legal you can do. At the very least it will give you something practical to do rather than sitting home fretting. Other than that I don't think there is a *&%#*+: you can do. Unfortunately dad knows exactly what he has done. He just does not know how to get out of the mess.
As a fellow engineer I know you are or should be making more than $70k a year, you are 53, so you must be experienced. I assume you are Civil, I am EE, working in tech sales instead. Focus on your career, your earning potential is way above what you are spending your energy on. Let go, let dad have his girl, even if you do not care for her. Focus on your relationship with your husband, focus on your career. I have no idea what your rights, to this trust are, if you must pursue that do so at the expense of what is left of your relationship with your father....all for less than a year's engineering salary.
Allow yourself to let go of this, it is eating away at you....move on. Be happy.
See All Answers