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Um, why would you not report this to the police? I assume you've already tried to confront the culprit yourself, have you?
The thing is, this is not financial abuse. This is intimidation and harassment at least, arguably verging on assault. Why is the culprit doing it?
Or how about going the tech route and installing a nanny cam or even better something like Echo so you can monitor things remotely?
I believe he is doing these things as he feels entitlement. There are 4 siblings. Usually POA and such goes down the line of succession. He is last in line, but he carries her last name from the second marriage after father died. He uses that to convey he is the only living heir. Oversteps the POA's to do what he wants. She don't have much, raising 6 kids on her own after his father was abusive to her other children.
My brother was doing the same thing it was a year before I knew what was going on and as much as my mother protest against the actions I took at the time; she now lives in peace. Yes my brother calls for money but now she doesn't have to answer the phone, and when he blows up at her on the phone I have gotten her to hang up on him. Of course my BF and I live with her so this has made it easier to stop my brother from coming over and demanding money and from stealing from her.
You problem sib is causing abuse and bring trouble to himself. This is what I did and am not sure if it will help!
Your problem sib is not playing by the rules of the game; therefore, remove him from the game!
If problem sib have keys to the house change the locks to the house. Your mom and your sib that lives with her need to come together and confront the problem sib that he/she is no longer welcome to come to the house any more. You should also be there for back up support. When your live in sib goes to work have mom not answer the door. Put in place what a few others here have stated here. This is a hard road to go down, but it is necessary! If your sib who lives there gets hit he or she needs to file a police report and get a ppo! Believe me no one will come and help her. I have been down that road. And yes my mother still wants to help my brother out but I put up road blocks because she doesn't know what she is doing half the time. Your mom has a right to live in safety as well as your other sib. I have even install a driveway alarm if cost 10 bucks but it lets me know someone is walking up the driveway.
But I must warn you your problem sib will get worst but in enough time he will get the point. If need be pay someone to sit with mom through this very trying time.
Do whatever you have to do to protect mom! Don't count on someone to come save the day...it doesn't happen! I am sorry to say! I just took matters in my own hand with common sense. My brother doesn't come around anymore! Be strong and the two of you can out smart the problem sib!
Good Luck!
assault on your brother
harassment of your mother
Social Security fraud
you presumably have records to prove all of these *crimes* -
and your mother won't assist the police, then I can only suggest you wind up her household, move her into a facility and let the resident brother set up his own home elsewhere.
Basically, you have either to confront the culprit brother and get him to stop, or to get your mother to a place of safety. Whoever has DPOA for health care needs to get one of those things done as soon as possible.
By the way - POA has absolutely nothing to do with birth order or anything like it. And nobody can feel a sense of entitlement to rob his mother. I really hope that together you can put a stop to his cruel nonsense.
Have you contacted your local elected officials to report non response? What kind of report have you made to police?