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Mom and Dad named each other 1st POA's and SIS second. SIS is acting and stealing. I got mom to change her POA but Dad is believing SIS and is not changing POA. (Dad has a touch of dementia.) I have tapped into Dad's IRA and SIS has withdrawn 3 times this year alone and deposited into her own account. Now SIS got my father to say "no more online account to IRA" so I can't monitor her stealing. SIS assumes I was the whistle blower so she told Mom she is fighting "dirty". She lives off my father's Social Security and goes out to dinner several times a week with her husband (alcoholic and gambler) and gives my diabetic dad food pantry food which is mostly sugary snacks. Our parents lawyer questioned SIS and said she could not come up with answers. How can we stop the financial and mental abuse without me draining my funds legally?

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Gather your evidence and report it to APS or your local police dept.
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What you are accusing your sister of is a crime. Report your suspicions to APS, giving the evidence you have uncovered. They will investigate.

Does she live with Dad? How is it that she is providing his food?
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Concerned, you and your mother saw a lawyer three days ago. Did you tell the lawyer about your sister's misappropriation of these funds? - her theft, in fact, not to beat around the bush.
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The lawyer questioned her and she didn't come up with the answers. Stealing his SS is a big no no. You are now dealing with the government. If the lawyer is not satisfied, then file charges of financial abuse. Your sister is abusing her POA. If either parent needs Medicaid in the next five years, there will be a penalty period when they see large amounts taken out of parents account. If Mom is of sound mind, she can revolk sister as her POA. If Mom is of sound mind, suster does not have the right to go over her head. The lawyer should have told her what she is doing is illegal.
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My Mom is of sound mind and did revoke SIS on her POA but not sure what we can do for dad. The lawyer does suspect SIS is stealing bit did not tell me to do anything on Dad's end just change Mom's POA and accounts and get a forwarding mail for Mom. SIS had dad tell lawyer over the phone that he wants the POA to stay as is. SIS is acting over MOM and she is only a successor.
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Will APS cost money?
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No APS will not cost money. It’s adult protective services. It’s basically tax payer funded.
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No SIS does not live with dad and mom. She controls his money, credit cards, etc. I think she MIGHT have a LITLLE HEART and doesn't want my parents to starve so she gets them food pantry food. My parents are not allowed store items (per SIS) she might throw them a bowl of egg salad or a plate of spaghetti.
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