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When I was a young mom of two, we visited my least favorite grandmother, a 2000 miles away. She was going to church, and then would make scalloped potatoes for a family gathering. I thought I would help, and I made the potatoes. My Gma chewed me out for doing that. At the dinner, several aunts asked my Gma if she had a new recipe, because the potatoes were very good! Tee-hee.
Also when I had two little ones, my family & my sister's family all flew "home" for Christmas. The adorable 2mo old niece had thrown up on the plane. Little did we know, she was sharing the stomach flu with all 14 of us, in the same house. I thought I had made it through with out it. On the 4th day, I asked Mom, what's for dinner. She asked me, "What do you feel like puking up? She was right. (:
Start a new one.
Some of my family of origin and most of my in-laws pepper their conversations with that nonsense. Sadly, holiday gatherings frequently serve as a showcase for their hate speech.
The part that always bowls me over? The biggest noise-makers have immigrant parents or immigrant grandparents.
But - of course - their people emigrated from the “correct” countries.
And built the great USA by toiling away in miserable factories. (Taking jobs away from Americans??).
And lived in ethnic enclaves where the adults could get by without learning English. (De rigueur in the 1st half of the 20th century. But unacceptable nowadays. 🤔)
And used their “weird” food and old-country rituals to bond with each other - and achieve pariah status. (All fine, because these immigrants did not hail from south of the border or Muslim countries or today’s war-torn 3rd world.)
And flooded the local schools with their filthy ragamuffin children. (When this applies to Dad or Grandpa, it’s a touching vignette. When this happens in their school districts today, it’s fodder for a vein-bulging rant.)
The tunnel vision is EXHAUSTING.
There’s no talking sense to these relatives. They truly Do Not See It.
**face palm**
(I’m Southern too, so I already know it’s “not all southerners.”)
During dinner she remarked that two of her grandkids had gotten baptized in her church, and what a special thing that was to her. She was truly sincere about it, and we all agreed it was a good thing.
Then not 10 minutes later, the topic is neighborhoods around our city, and she says “oh, those [N-word]s ruined what was a good part of town”. Husband, myself, and the cousins around our age said nothing but we all looked at each other like “the hell?”. This is from a woman who has never said so much as the word “damn” in front of anyone, but the N-word? No problem!
It is disturbing. My husband and I took a ride to Franklinton, Louisiana to visit a state part recently. Geeeez, they still have guys driving pick up trucks with huge rebel flags on the back of the trucks. Freaks me out to see that.
At one time Bogalusa, Louisiana had a huge KKK clan. It’s ridiculous!
Where I live in New Orleans it’s diverse. The ‘old southern’ attitudes are vanishing. They removed statues of Andrew Jackson and Robert E. Lee. Actually, huge monuments that were in Jackson Square and Lee Circle. Some people opposed because of their historical value but the mayor said it was time for them to be taken down due to many people saying they represented the ‘old southern’ ways.
I think you should type these up and send them to a publisher. I am not sure what the title of the book should be but it would be hysterical.
Would be different from the caregiver books out there on Amazon. That’s for sure. Hahaha
- Tell relative I am bringing Russian black bread for Christmas. Note to self - don't do it again as her response was NOT "thank you." "What's that?"
The tamales turned out good though AND we got to split aunt’s share since she stormed out before the first batch was even done!
That’s crazy, huh? Hahaha
My husband’s mean grandma would just be overjoyed when someone would mistake she and her daughter (my MIL) for sisters. It would infuriate my MIL. I would always tell her that she didn’t look old. It was because her mom looked much younger than she was.
I had a friend in sixth grade who was so embarrassed by her mom looking so young. Hahaha. Her mom went kind of wacko after getting divorced.
I guess sort of mid life crisis. She had a great figure. She would wear mini skirts, low cut tops, high heels, etc. Bought a fancy new car. The whole bit. My friend would tell me, “I wish my mom looked like a mom like your mom does.”
I never did like the old bat and after that rotten comment, I liked her a whole lot less. Two peas in a pod, my narcissistic mother and her insufferable sister!
Anyhoo, we’re all eating and as usual the topic comes to diets. For whatever reason grandma looks at me and says “you ought to go to Jenny Craig.” The hell?! I was 19 and weight was a very sensitive issue for me. Yeah I had a little extra padding, but was not obese by any means. She was heavier than me!
I kept it together through dinner but had to step away and cry a little. Mom said “Oh ignore her, she’s nuts.” Too late; was already embarrassed.
Grandfather topped it a few years later. There was a new baby in the family (my nephew) and of course he was the star of the show. So grandpa decides it’s a great time to nudge my cousin’s wife and ask “When are you gonna have one?”— knowing full well she’d had two miscarriages that year.
She got teary instantly (who could blame her?) but handled it nicely, and said “Grandpa, please don’t say things like that, it hurts my feelings!”. Grandpa, ever so clueless, just says “Ahh c’mon.”
Yep, can't make this stuff up.
Still laughing 20 years later. Love this thread, thanks!
My mom hosts Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, etc. She loves to host the meals and has the china, crystal, silver, etc to set a beautiful table. We all gather around the living room to join hands and say a prayer.. which Mom says and takes very seriously.
Anyway, Mom was saying the prayer and I looked up to check on my (then) eight year old son. He was holding my brother's hand and dry heaving. I thought my brother had passed silent gas (his specialty) and that my son was at the height to be "in the line of fire." I couldn't help it and began to giggle. I really tried hard to stifle it but that just made it worse! My husband was squeezing my hand trying to quiet me but that also made it worse. I just couldn't stop!!!
I ruined my mom's prayer and she was, understandably, not happy. I apologized but was still reminded how to behave during the prayer for the next several holiday dinners.
Turns out, my son was standing near an appetizer tray of cheese and crackers and was getting an unwelcome whiff of blue cheese. Not surprisingly, neither of us like that cheese!
Personally, I still love Santa! Hahaha
People do say the funniest things. I have a friend who hates Christmas music! The odd thing is that she is the pianist at her church and has to play it. She plays beautifully.
When we go out for coffee and they have Christmas music playing she says, “I hate Christmas music! I don’t want to hear it.”
She loves music but I think since she’s had issues with her family. She and her sisters are quarreling and she can’t handle the warm, fuzzy emotions of Christmas music.
Finally - one holiday dinner she was standing up while we were eating and yelling at us "have you found Jesus?!!!" My uncle put down his napkin, stood up and said "I didn't know he was lost - i'll go look for him" and left the table. I was 10 and of course enjoyed the ensuing drama - her getting VERY upset - yelling and crying, other relatives telling her to stop being a pill about religion. I feasted and watched the drama - better than any movie.
Then there was the time my sister's SIL stormed out of a gathering because she forgot to bring popcorn (for popping with the nieces and nephews for a movie later) and none of the kids wanted to leave their game to go with her to the store to buy the popcorn. It was a year before she spoke with anyone in the family - she can really hold a grudge.
There are times I chuckle about all of the family dramas - but honestly, would rather watch them in a movie than around a table.
One of my brother’s ex wives had a son who was a religious fanatic. He got upset because we didn’t say the blessing for an hour before we ate our dinner. We were sorry he came to our house for dinner!
He actually screamed saying our prayer of thanks was too short! Someone told me that when he says grace that it lasts an hour! Can you imagine? Hahaha
We say grace before meals but certainly not for an hour.
He called everyone up on the phone a few days after our holiday meal and asked if they were saved and had welcomed Jesus in their lives. He went overboard with religion.
Nice Thanksgiving convo around the dinner table!
There was an episode on one of the TV comedies (either Green Acres or Petticoat Junction) in which there was a meeting to discuss some situation, and one character said "Well, as I understand the problem...well, I don't REALLY understand the problem....in fact, what IS the problem?"--I hope I get an appropriate opportunity to say this sometime before I'm dead!