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Mom could very well become too needy if you jump and run every time she wants something. If you let her do things she is capable of doing, it might not be that bad.
Please feel free to come back with any questions. This is a great forum!
I wish I hadn't, my life has suffered trying to accommodate mum and she's 73. Don't do it if you have alternative options as in assisted living or memory care facility.(different terms for different countries greatly differ from what they call assisted living) example assisted living in Australia just means meals, that's all. Somewhere along the line she will take over your life with her medical, emotional & physical needs. Sure all of us live-in carers feel good in someway that we are not putting family member into a facility but the question to ask is do any of us regret it. I certainly do. I do love my mum but the impact alone on my mental health & social & fatigue from caring for elderly parent is to much.
Looking after someone who is elderly is 10 times harder than looking after a child. Caring for a elderly parent is like looking after a toddler that knows how to press all of your buttons the wrong way.
At 95, you are right about her becoming needy. Are you sure that you are up to caring for her? Maybe getting her some in home assistance would be better.
Take your time, especially now.. covid19 is nothing to sneeze at..
So, just tell her she needs to stay in place... virus.. very serious...
this should give you some time to find a place for her if you don't want her at your home...
You know what they say about "property" LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION...
So look at places close to you, so you can be comfortably close to her... She needs family.. 95 years old, do look for a place within 5 miles for both you and her. If you feel you cannot physically take care of her, your family, and work,,, then it is up to you to find a place for mom, CLOSE TO YOU... Trust me.. this will be okay... within a 5 minute to 15 minute driving distance will be okay. Between home and work is perfect... I actually did that... So if I needed to stop and see my elders, I was able to...without going out of my way... THIS BIT OF INFO IS IMPORTANT... You really don't know until you need to..
do your homework.. visit places, multiple times, do not tell them you are visiting... surprise them.. It's the best way... once we are out of covid19....
You used to live next door to your mother. You and your boyfriend have been together for fourteen years, and recently? moved a half hour's journey away from your mother.
Now you have become concerned about how she's going to manage, and... are thinking about your options? Have already suggested she should move in with you?
How far have you got with your plans? What are your mother's thoughts?
seriously look at your situation.. take it easy now covid... and talk with your family members... what choices do you have? What choices are there? Anyone else stepping in to help out?