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Can your Mom budget to move into Independent Living apartment? That way she would have a lot of people to chat in person, and she doesn't need to leave "home".
My Dad was in his 90's, still doing quite well, was also on the computer, but was so lost rambling around his home. We brought in caregivers which were a great help as Dad was able to narrow down the caregivers to those that he had a lot in common.
It wasn't until Dad decided to move from his house and move into senior living that he was more content. His apartment was no different than those that younger people rent. And all these new set of ears to hear his stories :) He made a lot of new friends there. And no more worries about dealing with his house, real estate taxes, lawn mowing, snowing shoveling, power outages, yada, yada, yada. As part of Dad's rent he had weekly housekeeping and linen service, plus meals in the main dining room.
Anyway, something to think about.
When they moved to IL, and now AL as my mom's needs ha e increased, my dad has relished being able to have friends at their facility. My mom no longer goes down for breakfast or lunch, but my dad has a group of buddies and they chat over meals. It has been a godsend.
Try having your mom do a staycation at q nice facility before you turn thumbs down...she may find she really likes the convenience of good company so close by.
Do you have a Senior Center near you maybe you can ask if they have the same type of program if not maybe suggest it.
How about a Church or other house of worship, maybe they have a group that gets together and one of the members would like to give your mom a call once a week. And these chats could be done by computer as well. It is just nice to hear a persons voice and have that contact.
Another thought...is there a teen or college student that would be willing to "interview" mom and write her Legacy? I am sure mom has some interesting things to say and it would be great to get some stories written down. And don't forget family recipes and other things that you will miss when she is gone. This could also easily be done via computer.
Joking here...can she come and stay with me for a while and teach me computer skills and get my finances in order?!
P.S. If my mother were to come over and help you with your computer skills, you'd be AMAZED at what she can do!! I failed to mention earlier her skill on Excel! I'm always flabbergasted when I see her spreadsheets containing her doctor visits, etc.!! I'm serious!!
I Googled "Friends For Seniors" and came up with lots of choices, including AARP and Meetup:
Never Too Old to Find New Friends
https://www.aarp.org/relationships/friends/info-04-2011/never-too-old-for-friends.html
Meetup: Seniors Making New Friends
https://www.meetup.com/topics/seniors-making-new-friends/
I'm 73 and am really isolated, while taking care of my 100-year-old mother.
Thanks for the lead.
I am an elder care provider. I have had the privilege of hearing their stories and talk for hours of what they remember. Life is vivid. Hospice care is my calling. I've learned a lot, and my experiance of caring for them and their family has rewards beyond monetary. Please don't doscourage something she finds comfort in. There are few people who can find a friend who is familiar, and understands where they are in life.
It is comforting. Maybe you can ask her about her friend. Get involved. Ask her to share with you. You may be surprised.
Also, check out Stitch.com, it has been recommended by a lot of reputable news sites.
If I were you, I would have your mom's computer set up where she cannot get into the internet. This is potentially very alarming - she can get into all kinds of trouble, perhaps giving out her address or friend-ing a scam. She'll be upset. That is okay. Better that she is safe and not able to invite strangers into her home - or bank account. Scams happen all the time.
Expect her to be upset. This happens when control and independence is 'taken away,' due to need. She will adjust in time.
You don't mention any physical disabilities. Perhaps she has arthritis that makes it to painful to go out or some other physical problem? Does she have to use a walker?
Personally, I don't see a problem. Let your mother be herself and when they get her age, she's earned the right to do what makes her happy. There is no harm in it, so let her be.
Best wishes, MoJoHo.
It is, as the name suggests, a forum for grannies. And grandpas, of course.
Here is an excerpt from their topic list:
Other subjects (2024)
Pedants' corner (471)
Pets (704)
Product tests and surveys (144)
Relationships (1691)
Religion/spirituality (358)
Science/nature/environment (666)
Site stuff (1063)
Sponsored discussions (70)
Sport (210)
Style & beauty (1196)
TV, radio, film, Arts (2840)
Technology (979)
Travel (747)
Webchats (120)
I am a member myself. Although I joined seeking emergency advice last year and haven't had time to cultivate friendships, I must say their members were very helpful indeed.
Perhaps there is a US equivalent? - or if your mother might be interested in this one I am sure she would be made very welcome. You'll find them at https://www.gransnet.com/forums
Your only concern should be that she has healthy food, a comfortable home, proper health care, and that her bills are paid. If she wants to chat online I suggest she not use her full name, address, birth date, social security #nor give any private information. She can make up a name and the rest and still join almost any site like Facebook. Tell her that her conversations online must never under any circumstance reveal her identity.
By the way, my mom is also 90 and LOVES just being at home with only me and my sister as visitors. She enjoys knitting, her tv programs, her books, magazines, her mandolin, her piano, and phone conversations. She no longer wants to shop, have a social life, nor have people come in and out of her house. She enjoys being a loner and that's perfectly fine at age 90 if that's what she wants. She has no interest in a computer so I don't have that worry.
That kind of scam would not be reimbursed by a bank. It would just be a too bad, so sad mistake on her part. There is no safe group on the internet. There's always some scammer trying to make a buck