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Was Mom in a Assisted Living or a Long-term care facility? If so, the cost would have been over 5k for AL and 10k or more for LTC. That eats 166k up fast.
Is 166k what you feel she received in SS over a period of years? I figured at 1500 a month, that would be 9 years. If Mom had a home, that 1500 would be eaten up in upkeep, taxes and bills.
The home...if Mom was in an AL or NH it may have been sold for Moms care. If sold after her death, then I would question it.
POA stops at death. A Will can not be probated until 10 days (or about) after death. The Executor takes the Will to Probate and its filed and made public. All beneficiaries must be notified the Will is now filed and sent a copy of it or tell them its available to them. The Executor is now responsible to pay all outstanding bills. An accting is done and beneficiaries sign off or contest at that time,
No Will, then a family member files to become an Administrator. They do everything an Executor does but...the State determines who inherits. Usually the children first.
To find out if a Will has been filed, you call Probate in the County Mom lived in. You can get a copy thru them.
Now a Will does not need to be filed right away. My Mom died in Sept and I didn't file till Nov. So, I don't think it would be wise to hire a lawyet at this time. I would give your sister some time. But if after a reasonable time you hear nothing from her, you will need to call her and ask if Moms estate has been probated. If she says there was no estate to probate then ask ur questions but don't accuse. One simple question, what happen to her estate. The answer maybe, it was used for her care. Before the house was sold, the taxes, utilities and up keep still had to be paid.
I was POA for my mom. I was also the trustee of her estate. During the last year and a half of her life, I paid her bills and did her finances, but not in my capacity as POA, because although she was frail in her body, she was of sound mind. I did all of her finances at *her direction*, because she lacked the physical ability to do them anymore. But I never signed anything as "POA".
Insofar as owing you an accounting of how mom's funds were spent - you don't mention anywhere what your mom's living situation was - did she live in a facility? Own her own home? Live with your sister? You don't really say anything about your mom's health issues - if any - or give us any other information that might be helpful in advice guiding you to your next steps.
There are some very immoral family members who take financial advantage of their elderly LO's; but there are many more who are just trying to do the best they can. Mom's money should have gone to mom's care. If you believe that isn't the case, then by all means, seek legal advice. But if you're just annoyed that you're not getting the slice of inheritance pie you had figured you were going to get, my advice is don't waste your time and money seeking legal restitution, because you're not going to come out ahead, financially, in the long run.
A comment from me:
It’s odd that you know so little about your deceased mom, like whether she had a will or not. If you two were close, she would have told you all that.
Please don’t tell me, you dumped all the caregiving problems/stress on your POA sister, disappeared for years when they (mom + sister) needed your help, and now that your mom died you just want the MONEY.
Yes, family members are entitled to an accounting.
After the principal dies, executors and trustees must account to all of the beneficiaries for how the estate is being handled.
If there is a will and your sister is executor she is accountable to the named beneficiaries, the court and the will can be challenged in particular by close family members who are left out of the will which is why a little something is often left to everyone who could contest or actual mention is made in the will if some family members are specifically left out. Be very sure that it’s worth it though if you choose to do this because you will burn through money hiring your own lawyer and likely burn bridges and relationships with family which might seem fine now but might not in the future.
No Will, no assets so Will can't be probated, then see an Elder Lawyer. I really don't see were you have to have proof, as POA sister need to keep good records. She needs to show proof.
Was Moms house sold for her care in an AL or NH? An AL can run 5k or more a month, a NH 10k or more a month. So 166k will not last long.
If there is a Will Mom seems to no longer have an estate so its really null and void. When her house was sold, you should have been allowed to take what you wanted.
If you are a beneficiary of a will the executor according to the laws of the estate must publish a letter to you telling you that you are. Wills, unlike Trusts, are filed for probate and are public documents. They must be filed within a certain time limit. If your sister is also executor and you cannot talk to her you can check on the publication of a will.
No, your sister was the POA and owes NO ACCOUNTING to you. She spent the money as she did for your mother as she saw fit. IF you suspected elder abuse or fraud WHILE YOUR MOM WAS ALIVE you could have contacted an attorney to ask the court to examine her records. It is too late to do that now. The POA does not owe information to ANYONE but the one who appointed her and to the court.
If your Mother had any remaining assets worth over $75K in most states this would mean probate, so you can ask the attorney this question as well.
Please note that if your Mother was in a facility for few years it is totally possible all those funds went to pay for that, or privately hired caregivers. If she needed medical-level care this is the most expensive, and also MC is very pricey.
How do you know how much money she had? How long ago was that? Do you have the funds to pay an attorney for the consult or if you lose?
A person acting with power of attorney is accountable for how the protected person's money is spent. Only that does not necessarily mean that your sister is accountable directly to you. If you have substantial grounds for believing that your sister misappropriated or misspent your mother's money, and you have properly taken into account the probable costs of your mother's care and living expenses during the time your sister was acting for her, there will be steps you can take - get legal advice.
Also - I'm asking, not accusing - but when you say your mother "just" passed, when was this? And was your sister also your mother's primary caregiver? It's just that sometimes family members who have not been closely involved expect the will to be read pretty much at the funeral and to collect their cash-stuffed envelopes on the way out, and become immediately suspicious without realizing how long things take to sort out. Have you allowed a decent interval?