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The main thing is not to deny that she see them (she does - how or why isn't the issue). So the issue is to try to explain the reason that they don't respond since that seems to be what upsets her.
Validation is one of the most challenging and creative things a caregiver must do in order to help the loved one. Sometimes it's not possible to provide enough comfort, but do what you can and then try distraction.
Good luck to you. You sound like a wonderful caregiver.
Carol
She is having hallucinations and/or delusions about relatives, some or all of whom are deceased but without her acknowledging that they are dead. That is quite a different matter.
The most common advice for dealing with people who are hallucinating or are delusional is not to argue about the experience. If they see Harry, they see Harry. Try to reassure them about any aspects of the experience that are distressing.
(My Mom recently asked me if I knew when Dad was getting back from his fishing trip. I did not point out that he died 18 years ago. I merely said I didn't know but I sure hoped he'd caught a lot of fish ... and then turned the discussion topic to fish fries!)
It seems that the disturbing part of these experiences for you mother is that these hallucinations don't speak to her. Reassure her about that. "Oh Mom, you know that Bill is too vain to get glasses. He probably didn't recognize you!" You don't need to know or explain anything about "Bill" being there at all. Accept your mother's version, but give her some comfort about why they aren't talking to her.
Incidentally, I am a believer...and have heard hundreds upon thousands of stories of the dead visiting when the time to pass for the receiver of the visit is near...
Angel
BTW, if she's close to the end, she may start to be able to interact.
experience. maybe it was a dream maybe an hallucination who knows. but I went to a place where my dead mother was. i did not see her but i distinctly heard her say "Don't think you are coming in here" from that I assumed she meant her current abode. As I said I never saw her but I did see her sister and knew they were all really there but the one aunt was the only one I recognized.
Was I dreaming or hallucinating who knows but just thought i would share that.
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