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No to be scary sounding, but at the end of dad's life, he would WANT to eat, maybe just soup or broth, but it would come right back up. His body was rejecting food as a sign of its shutting down.
We wound up just giving him popsicles and letting the liquid kind of run down his throat verrrrrry slowly. That he could usually keep down.
I hope you get some answers soon.
No good in rehashing what you 'should have' done. In rehab, they would have her on IV's for hydration. No doubt she is now severely dehydrated which actually makes keeping fluids down harder.
Is she in active Hospice? Once daddy was getting morphine, he was relaxed enough to keep 'more' fluids down. By more, I mean, maybe 12 ounces a day.
Try the popsicle--red was the most flavorful--and when she is 'numbish' due to the cold, give her the morphine. Then follow up with more popsicle.
Do you also have access to Valium in cream/ointment form. Rubbing that on daddy's forearms where the skin is thin was really helpful. I would do that to help calm his agitation (then I'd rub the rest into my own hands as I would with hand lotion..it took me a few times to realize that I was dozing off sitting next to him having 'shared' a Valium rub :) If you don't have the Valium ointment, ask for some. It is not as strong as if it were ingested, but they do get a pretty decent dose through the skin.
I'm sorry for what you're going through. We did this with daddy and it was a learning curve, for sure.
Don't be too surprised if your mom never does regain her ability to 'eat' as you have expected in the past.
She is still having very, very minor BMs.
I'll be sure to mention all this to the nurse. Hopefully, she'll come tomorrow as they're short handed and aren't on a regular schedule except sometime once a week.
Thanks for the suggestions everyone.