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So if you have complicated finances and lots of assets I would try a different lawyer because that’s ridiculous.
But personally, I do think that for couples where 1 (your Arlene) needs LTC Medicaid & the other (you) are still healthy & likely to continue to be living in your community as a CS (community spouse) for several years more, well that situation needs a NAELA or CELA level of elder law attorney. There’s lots of little factors for couples that do not come into play for a widower or widow individual LTC Medicaid application. For individual Medicaid, kids can DIY it totally if they know the parents financials & have POA imo.
But couple stuff more complicated, like there’s the spousal exemption that Cali mentioned. But bank accounts have to be set up to isolate your income & assets from Arlene’s and do them so no future issue for Medicaid. Can you do this DIY, maybe but.... maybe not. Your income doesn’t count for her Medicaid eligibility. But month after you get income, it becomes an asset & might affect her eligibility if it takes you above spouse asset limit.
If you should be over the spouse asset max, you might be able to do a SPIA (single premium immediate annuity) for overage. I hate annuities in general as imho they have commission structure not in your favor & folks don’t clearly understand them. But a SPIA is a very special creature for a CS like you.
Like say you all have 225k in savings. Your CS exemption is $126k, so you’re 99k over. Which Medicaid expects to be spent down on Arlene. But you might could put 125k into a SPIA & drag it so it pays you minimum possible under actuarial tables. This way your under the 126k max. Say $500 mo from SPIA to you as income. Now you personally get $800 a mo from your SS. Your income $1300 mo. But you have rent, recurring medical, prescription, other living costs that run $1900 mo. Your short $600 a mo to cover CS costs. Say Arlene gets $1250 SS a mo paid to her. You can file for you to get CSRA or MMNA paid to you from Arlene’s SS$. So $600 of her monthly income gets waived to go to you rather than to NH as her required copay or SOC (share of cost). Community spouse resource allowance or Monthly maintenance needs allowance- think of these like oldschool alimony. She would pay NH just $600 as her Medicaid copay & keep $50 as her own NYS needs allowance.
Can you file for CSRA or MMNA on your own?, maybe but NAELA atty will know how to structure all income & assets as to balance out your needs both for now & your own future but keeps your wife ok for her Medicaid eligibility. You should not impoverish yourself, only your NH spouse needs to. Not all states allow SPIA.
SPIAs are speciality underwriting. Maybe dz or so firms that do them & usually thru NAELA /CELA attorneys. SPIA not, imo, done by some guy holding an insurance license. Not a DIY to wade thru ever imo.
I truly think for couples it’s not a DIY as your overwhelmed by the day to day of still being a husband & living independently. Atty will be able to give you options as to what to do & that is ok for how New York medicaid runs. NYS seems to have different financials than other states.
Also if you are like most couples, you have each other as beneficiary of each other’s life insurance. Bad idea if Medicaid involved. There’s usual cash value spend down aspect for Medicaid. But for couples theres another problem if you predecease her. That insurance $ from your death takes her over Medicaid limits. Your gone, so who is gonna deal with her Medicaid eligibility? Insurance policies will need to be looked at & probably changed. That too an atty can guide you on. There’s going to be one with fee at least half of what the one you saw. $5k seems to be a standard for doing couples planning & legal. Good luck!
Igloo, may I ask what you do? Are you an attorney. I don't understand some of what you say but know you know YOUR stuff. Are there alternatives to attorneys for information. I know they have to do the final setting in stone, but can the details be worked out with, say, a good CPA. An estate manager? I know DollyMe and Cali have such great advice, and once knew what they did. There must be some alternatives out there for folks. Found all this fascinating. Thank you for it.