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Best of luck to you.
You say your looking for in home help for both, of you do you mean you both need help with physical needs?
I'm not sure your husband's needs, but you can call an Uber to get him to appointments, give you a break.
Which really sounds like you need a break.
There are caregiveing services that you can also get, they will do light house cleaning and errands for you, they are not cheap, though.
And of course you can pay most bills online now, so that should help. And you can hire someone to come once a week to clean and even do your laundry if needed.
You just have to start looking for ways to work smarter and not harder.
And with those questions come answers dependent in our country almost ENTIRELY on your assets.
You have to, if you go into care, know that the cost is onerous. And if you hire in help the same applies. Everyone is in the position you are in eventually/ultimately. Trying to figure out how much you have, and have saved, having to figure out if you can afford or even qualify for care, and if so how MUCH care and WHEN given the assets you have accumulated.
I think (I am 82) that you are not alone in assessments that now need to be made. For a while at least, you and hubby may be just fine with minimal assists with shopping and cleaning. But the time will come. My partner and I basically think all the time of one of us failing, requiring care, or going all together. And then decisions are all on the other, and made by the other.
No easy answers here, I am afraid. It is one day at a time. And at least you are considering the options. That's a positive thing, and realistic. Having said THAT, the old expression is that "Man plans and God laughs".
I wish you the best.