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But I can still tell you my kids’ current measurements, brand of jeans that fit each one best, shoe sizes, favourite colours for decor and for clothing (different aesthetic), upcoming events, summer job schedules, et cetera, so I think it’s all cool.
Anyone else ready to drink every time they hear their teen daughter use the word “aesthetic”?
Having talked with peers, it seems we’re overwhelmed with stress, broken sleep, hormones, aches, and general chaos. I can’t keep as many balls in the air as I used to.
I certainly worry - a lot - that my brain will break and I’ll become like my mother. But I’m not putting my meds in envelopes to mail to myself, nor my keys under the bathroom sink, nor socks in with legal documents nor pj pants in the fridge, so I think I’m good.
But I am sorting my excess stuff to make life easier... just in case.
Beyond that, it's also good for each of us. I'm reminded of this when I watch nature programs and see various species of monkeys, from small to large, grooming each other.
And when I'm upset I call a friend or relative. After we've discussed the issue, I feel much better, and that works both ways. Friends and family call me when they're upset; we put on our thinking caps and hash out the issues.
(Hope posted on 7-29; her post is on the second page, but in reviewing it, I thought it was well worth bringing to the forefront of the discussion.)
if you get a medical evaluation consider that dementia is not an actual disease, but a “catch-all” description of someone suffering from cognitive impairment caused by something.
When we hear “dementia” it makes us feel like giving up because the decline sounds hopeless, but that is instead when we should kick into high gear - to find a reason and see if the situation can be improved before it gets worse.
A competent doctor should be able to find at least one medically identifiable reason for the decline, rather than just explaining it as an unavoidable expectation associated with old age.
(if a doctor were to say someone is diagnosed with dementia with no further analyses, they should get a new doctor immediately).
Some causes can be treated to entirely reverse or prevent worsening symptoms. Some examples of potential causes are overmedication, stroke, high blood pressure, emotional distress/stress, Parkinson’s, renal disease, heart disease… there are many more …all can cause a patient to present with cognitive decline or impairment.
Even when a patient is elderly and suffering from more than one health problem, cognition can be improved with excellent medical care. Even if this has continued for a while.
Get a complete physical. Review your CBC when the results are available. (Don’t just wait for your doctor to say you “passed”.). Are any of your values more elevated or lower than the normal range? At the outer limits but still within the normal range? Look over your medications. Make sure your doctors conduct tests looking for potential explanations.
(If they only do the “neurological test” where they read you a page long story about Mary and them ask you to recite Mary’s address from the third sentence, and then diagnose you with dementia or Alzheimer’s, find a new doctor and write a Yelp review of that one).
Unfortunately there are a lot of incompetent doctors. Many are eager to prescribe another prescription and shuttle us out of the office, shouting “Next,” with inadequate follow-up. The doctor’s office and the hospital are two of the most dangerous places you can go.
The patient and their family has to take on the responsibility of ensuring adequate medical care through education and advocacy.
This came up in a conversation I had just yesterday with a 54yo - 2 other over 50s ladies then joined in!
But for piece of mind, see your Doc.
Stress, fatigue, lack of sleep, vitamin deficiencies, post infection esp Covid.. all these can cause brain fog too.
I just use the general Scottish term 'thingy' to replace whatever word I need 😁
I misspelled it previously and cannot correct the spelling.
Being a caregiver is stressful, and stress plays a big role in health issues. I know this first hand. In fact, when I was once in a very stressful environment, I was starting to forget everything. Once I was out of that environment for a while, it was like the veil was lifted off my brain.
Menopause brain fog is real, too. Every woman goes through menopause differently, but this is pretty common. A friend of mine went through that a few years ago. She would reach for words often, forget things, and always mentioned that she had brain fog. She did not and still does not have dementia. I had read that once menopause passes, full abilities resume.
I also read an article in the past from Harvard that said believe it or not, trying to find words for something is more common than we think. If I can find it again, I'll post the link.
I wish you the best!
I have a 14 year old with some minor limitations from being a pediatric stroke survivor and a 20 year old at home. I feel very overwhelmed, work part time, am in excellent shape one of my jobs is a fitness instructor/health and wellness coach. I know all the right things to do but I did tell my psychiatrist. He said it could be due to some ADHD traits we increased my medication for depression/focus. I got a blood test showed my vitamin D was low so I started a supplement. I think I would suggest getting a evaluation by a neurologist or psychiatrist and take it from there. Thats my next step since I'm not quite convinced i'm suffering from just stress and ADHD traits.
Wishing you all the best here dealing with this situation.
You're preforming like a professional juggler, and there are a couple of silly clowns on the sidelines that will throw you extra balls, a bottle of pop, a shoe, and a pineapple into the mix every so often, and it's all jolting. Caregiving is difficult enough for young parents for their babies and kids, but for a pretty much lone adult it is taxing on your brain more than you realize. So, you must schedule breaks when you can. Hire an aid if you must to help your dad while and go away for a weekend, or sometimes just for a one night sleepover trip here and there. Hiring once in a while is good practice anyway for the future.
Forgetting a word can be an indication. Do you remember :D, if your mom started that way? Menopause could be a problem. I only had 3 heat flashes before I happened to mention it to my chiropractor. Telling me to buy the best quality, for ladies over 50, vitamins completely helped. That was 25 years ago. Holy mackerel.
Do you write? Do you socialize? Talk to people much? That's what had me loose my ablitiy to remember words after all these 20 years of caregiving parents and now my husband, until I ramped up writing, attending events and talking to people, rather than just cleaning, cooking, chauffeuring, and scheduling. I also started to sing. I never sang until I was 69. I found that although I knew melodies I remembered few words to a song so I printed out the lyrics, and baby, I just don't care what I sound like, move over Ethel Merman.
Don't skip over words when you read. Look them up and look them up again.
If you are becoming forgetful, get clever, keep a steno pad near the phone, (and a hard copy calendar around). When a friend calls, and half way in the conversation she mentions that she thinks her little toe is getting arthritic write that down - Becky. Right toe, Hurts, and the next time you talk, casually check your pad, ask how her toe is doing. Keep a pad by your bed too. Having such a back up plan allows you to relax and will often result in your not needing to refer to the pad only because you not so anxious about forgetting. You become your own reliable backup plan.
Go for Memory Screening if you'd like, but no matter what, go swimming or do something rhythmic. Schedule fun for yourself to be at your best for your family, but mostly for you.
Be a bum once in a while. It's very salubrious.
LOL 🤣🤣
I forced myself to dress today (1st day off for a while). Into casual wear (comfy elastic waist pants, loose tee, long cardi), no hairstyle, no makeup. In fact this is so VERY similar to my to my PJ evening look. Ha ha.
I want a teeshirt that says Bum-Mum.
Sometimes we’ve always been a certain way, not always to do with old age.
First thing I would caution about, stress causes funny things to happen with our brains, so worrying about it can exacerbate the problems.
Hormones play a huge roll in our overall well-being.
You are dealing with a double whammy.
Get your annual physical and speak with your doctor about everything you are dealing with. They should be able to reassure you about your health.
Don't forget to take care of you while helping mom and dad. If you are ill, you help nobody.
By the way, my friends have teased me since my early 20s that I have Oldtymers vs Alzheimer's. My brain moves at a different speed then my thoughts or speech, loses things, oh well, could be worse ;-)
Talk with your doctors about it and trusted family and friends. Take a shot at “ not claiming “ this. We know some things are genetic and others can be stress or fear( I believe the combination of those things are not healthy for the mind, body and soul).
Write a journal, jot down what you’re experiencing. Personally, I say, if you can’t fix it/ change it.. then make
peace with it… the struggle begins when you fight between the two. This is how I view the Serenity Prayer.
If you’re a spiritual person” have faith and trust the process. Our Creator will send all that you need and just when you need it!
Sending you positive vibes💕
second … consider physical problems
Third consider mental problems
fourth see a doctor
certainly it’s possible you have the possibility of dementia but dont freak out and think thats what youre feeling.
there are several physical conditions that can cause brain fog and those are aggravated by body chemistry imbalance or can cause problems even without stress … like your thyroid.
you can ask your doc about an ultrasound for thyroid since that problem wont always show up when they feel your throat at an appointment.
anyway … there are non-addictive anxiety meds that may help with stress. Try to start out on the low end and then get stronger meds if necessary.
check those out with a doc. It’s natural too think about dementia right away but there may be other controllable factors instead that youre not aware of.
I can honestly say that I personally feel like I’ve got dementia too due to all the above stressers. I keep losing my train of thought, I’m slow learning new stuff because I forget (I’m relying on physical notes) and i took my mum to her dr appointment on the wrong day and I’ve started making mistakes with writing. As in I think I’ve wrote a certain sentence and then I’ll read it again later and notice mistakes or whole words missing.
I feel like it’s stress and lack of rest ,... well I hope so!!!
Thank you for taking a moment to send a note despite your own challenges. I really appreciate it. What you shared is helpful.
God bless your good, hard work.