How to get my mother with dementia to stop driving with revoked license?

If you know when she is driving, call the police. I am lucky that I live jn a small town. So the police are usually local and we at least know their parents. I may call and ask if a police officer can go to Moms house and talk to brother with Mom present. Then explain that Moms license has been revoked and brother could be held responsible for allowing her to drive. Now they have the cars discription and license# they will be on the lookout for her. If caught driving her car will be impounded.

Advise your brother than he can face heavy penalties (legal and civil) if he is allowing her to drive when he knows she does not have a license. God forbid she kills someone or herself...he could go to prison. Explain that to him. Hopefully it will scare him straight. If not, have someone disable the car.

We actually asked the police chief in my mom's home town about this. If she has a revoked license or if the doctor writes an order that she cannot drive, all we need to do is notify the police department and we can take the car even if we do not have our name on the title.

However, if there is no such order OR if her license is still active, do not take the car, you are guilty of theft. The Chief was quite clear on that.

I expect the eye doctor to revoke my mom's license next week. I will then call the Chief and take her car away.

Report the situation to local DMV and law enforcement. Tell brother you are doing so and of his liability in letting her drive

Have you tried spelling out for your brother the terrible risk he is opening your mother to? I would tell him in very stark terms. If a kid on a bike crosses her path and she runs over the kid, she would almost certainly be sued for everything she has. The fact that she has been diagnosed with dementia and has had her license revoked makes it worse for your brother. I don’t know the particulars of the law here, but he is knowingly aiding her in very unsafe behavior.

Would he give her a loaded gun? I know this sounds extreme but I think it’s equivalent. Not only could she get lost or get in an accident where she is hurt or killed — she could hurt or even kill other people.

good luck!!!

Your brother is letting her drive so he doesn't have to drive her himself. I realized my dad needed to let me drive them around more but I did ask myself "How bad is it?" for too long before I said I was going to be their chauffeur from now on.

That a difficult situation! Your brother is sabotaging your efforts to keep your mother and others safe if she gets behind the wheel of a car.
Since her license is revoked she is breaking the law. Consider calling the police next time she drives or explain the situation.
I would tell your brother that since he insists on allowing your mother to drive that it’s his responsibility if anything should happen to her or others. If she should ( God forbid) hit someone due to lack of reflexes or cognitive ability, that burden is on him.

I have had to have my aunt license revoked and tell my husband if he can’t see pedestrians walking on the side of the road he shouldn’t be driving. Neither of the are driving. If neither of those work, I would lawyer up.

Are you her POA?
Because without that there is little you can do other than to report her to the police and the DMV.

You say she has been living with brother and has gifted him the car but that she allows this and she uses it.
Time for a discussion with brother. If HE is the POA then he is not fulfilling his fiduciary role. I would tell him that doing this understanding what could happen means he is endangering his principal, and that you will report him to APS if he continues to endanger your mom.

The gifting is also not good unless BOTH their names remain on the title, because if she needs to depend on any governmental assistance in the next 5 years this gift will be having to be returned to her assets. And you should consider that, given your brother doesn't understand 5 year (2 1/2 in Cali) lookbacks, what else doesn't he understand about being POA?

I would consider going to local DMV with your question, and reporting this to your mother's doctor.

Slash all 4 of her tires. That should do the trick.

Every time this question comes up, I cringe. Because I know the primary piece of advice is going to be: "call the police".

And I have bad news for everyone - and this is coming from over 20 years as a law enforcement officer- there is very little that the police can do in this situation.

Elderly adult refuses to give up their car - for whatever reason - still has a valid license, proper registration and maintains the proper insurance but shouldn't be driving; nothing the police can do. DMV has said this elderly person can drive, and they have the legal right to own a car. The police CANNOT take someone's property without due cause. And "due cause" is defined by the courts, not family members. Furthermore, at least in NY, it is not illegal to own a car and not have a valid license. You can't legally drive it, but you can still own it, register it and insure it. It can sit in your front yard for years without ever being driven, but it is still your legally your property, and as such, can't just be removed by authorities without due process.

Now, in this particular case, mom has had her license revoked. All well and good, EXCEPT she gave the car to her son, so it is now HIS property, and again, cannot be removed by the authorities without due process. If OP want to call the police on mom when she is driving, knowing her license has been revoked, that is an option, but keep in mind that, depending on the state, this might result in mom being arrested. The car would be taken for safekeeping, but brother could likely still get it back, because legally, it's his property. Might the arresting agency make it difficult or uncomfortable for him, sure; but more than likely, they will just want to get the car back to it's owner so it is no longer their (the police) responsibility to keep it safe. As far as the police are concerned, they did their job - they got the unlicensed driver off the road when they observed her driving, and the car has been removed from their jurisdiction. It will then be up to the court to decide what happens from there. AND that's only IF mom actually gets arrested; most police officers won't be enthusiastic about arresting an elderly confused woman for ANY reason. Unless mom has a catastrophic accident, the most likely scenario is 1) mom will be brought back to the precinct, with another officer driving this car there 2) son will be called ("hey Mr. So-and-So, we just found your mom driving your car the wrong way down 5th Avenue and she seems really confused, maybe you should come and pick her up, we're located at XXX") 3) son comes and gets mom and offers sincere apologies with fervent promises that while he doesn't know how this happened, he will make sure it never happens again. If mom has a catastrophic accident, then the car will probably be vouchered as evidence, and mom will go to jail, dementia or no. But by that point, the worst will have come to pass, which is what everyone is trying to avoid.

I know no one wants a fight with their elderly LO's who are adamant that they can still drive, but some fights you have to have. And if that means yelling, screaming, hiding keys, disconnecting batteries, etc., then that's what might have to be done. If it means finding a way to legally take the car yourself, then that's what has to be done. But unfortunately, calling the police is rarely going to be the answer you're looking for to this problem.