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An important question to ask you is whether she has an assigned PoA? If so, this person needs to be notified of the concerns and then read their PoA document to see what activates the authority (usually it is an official diagnosis by a doctor).

How old is your MIL?

What symptoms does she have that leads you think she's having a cognitive issue? FYI there are some illnesses that can also create dementia-like symptoms. One is a UTI. This is what she should be tested for first and foremost. The way you get an uncooperative person in for treatment is to call 911 and tell them she is not behaving like herself and you suspect a UTI. They will test her for this in the ER and prescribe antibiotics if she has an infection.

But if she doesn't, they will not do a cognitive test in the ER. This could be done most easily through an exam with her primary doctor. You may need to tell her a "therapeutic fib"... that an annual (free) wellness exam is required for her benefits to continue -- or whatever narrative you think will motivate her to go. Before the appointment you go into her medical portal (if she has one set up) or have a pre-written note that you discretely hand to the nurses explaning who you are and what your concerns are. Then you need to stay in the room during the entire exam (sit behind her if possible) so that when the doc asks her questions you can confirm or correct her answers. This is exactly what I did with my MIL and I was shocked at how poorly she did. She couldn't draw a clock face nor remember the 3 words (and this is the simpler cog test).

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Reply to Geaton777
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Tiredniece23 Nov 5, 2024
Same with my aunt. She could not draw a clock of the time given to her by the doctor, nor remember three words he gave her and asked her to repeat.
She was given additional appointments to come in for testing, but did not bother to show up for them, and cousins felt like she was doing ok, so did not bother taking her for additional tests. Probably couldn't put up with the temper tantrums. Neither could I.
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More information is needed.
Why do you think your MIL has dementia?
Does your MIL live alone?
Who is your MIL next of kin?
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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She probably refuses to go to the doctor precisely b/c she is afraid the doctor will diagnose her as having Dementia.
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Reply to RedVanAnnie
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swmckeown76 Nov 9, 2024
Do the SAGE test. It's available online,
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erickam80: Assuming that she is on Medicare, start with the annual Medicare wellness exam, which could lead to a referral to a specialist.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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Look up Harmonic Health they provide a comprehensive dementia screening via video visit. They provide support for dementia care.

https://www.harmonichealth.com/
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Reply to Albaby123
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Have you talked to her physican or are you not on her list of benefactors.
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Reply to MartinaS
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If you 'think' she has it (sometimes things are normal and sometimes they aren't), you might want to get all her paperwork in order. Will, joint name on banking accounts, investments or other such accounts. Authorized person on health and other insurance, etc. POA and Med POA. Make sure second name(s) on everything. Being able to access each and everyone of her personal items will be of the utmost importance. Once she's diagnosed, or just reaches the point she obviously can't make appropriate decisions trying to manage her finances and talking with insurance or other medical contacts will create a nightmare for her family if all these other details are not sewn up.

I often wonder why people want a diagnosis.....unless other health issues may contribute to finding out if it's dementia or something like a brain tumor. Some mental changes can be something easy to rule out such as urinary infection, or looking at side effects of certain drugs. I've seen quite a few posts here where they confirm diagnosis and then wonder if they should tell the person. In that regard, I say 'no'. Why tell them? On my good days it would be something sad for me or constantly in my brain of what is to come. That's just me, though.
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Reply to my2cents
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Mobile doctors or nurse practitioners may be able to come into her home with someone she knows, to make the introductions. Alva Deer has great questions to help you.
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