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If he were my Dad, would I think it in his best interests to return to his spouse of less than a year so that he can continue to provide care services, either directly or through his VA entitlements, while I win a part-time transportation job? Would I heck.
But in this as in everything: we need to know the gentleman's own wishes first and foremost. What does he want to happen? Scottc420, are you able to visit him or are the children trying to cut you out altogether?
Isthisreallyreal's idea of investigating whether you can continue to live together in this (or perhaps a similar facility) seems best to me, I must say. If it isn't a rude question, how old are you?
Do you rely on him and need care?
I think I would be finding out if you can get a shared room with him.
If you are quite a bit younger than him you will have a fight on your hands. His children are doing what they believe is in his best interest. How would him being home taking care of himself and you benefit his wellbeing, that is what is important.
I can understand his kids thinking that taking care of you will drive him to an early grave.
First, your ages. Makes a difference in our answers.
To be in a NH your husband must need 24/7 care. What is his illness?
Do his children have his financial and medical POAs. Do they have guardianship? If they have POA, ur husband gave them the responsibility to carry out his wishes. Guardianship can't be over ridden.
Are u having money problems because the kids have taken over?
1. What level of care does your husband require?
2. Who was caring for him before he entered the NH?
3. What is your plan for getting his care needs met?
4. What was the reason that his children placed him in his current facility?
IS it in his best interests? What's your better plan for him?
As you weren't able to prevent your husband's children having your husband admitted to a nursing home, or haven't been able anyway to have him discharged since, I assume you don't have any kind of power of attorney for your husband but his children do. Is that correct?
Why was he admitted? - what are his care needs?