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If not,i don't se a problem
Hap
tennessee, don't be so quick to beat up on yourself as not being the best role model. As for your siblings who may not care, it is hard, no doubt, but it is also an expectation imposed on them. Sad though it may be, they are not required to care, but it may be that they do care and simply do not have the emotional strength you have to face the circumstances you are facing with your Dad. Family, or not, I choose to not blame anyone who runs away from the enormity of caregiving. Being a caregiver requires commitment that some folks simply don't have, or simply may not have the endurance or energy. I really do understand that and can't blame anyone who backs off, though I personally don't choose to live my life that way when it comes to providing assistive care to either of my parents.
If you feel up to it and think it will help you to move forward, you may want to consider calling a family meeting with your siblings to let them know how you feel and offering them ideas of what they might consider doing to pitch in. If you do go that route, still remember that it is all about our own expectations of what another person who is a relative ought to be doing. They are free agents who may decide otherwise, which still leaves the issue of an unmet expectation- unless we choose to adjust, let go, and move on to plan b. It is hard to be primary caregiver. I understand, first hand. Sounds like you may need a break. There is nothing wrong with that. If family won't come to your aid, you may want to consider respite services? Whatever you do, celebrate that you are doing your very best. Don't bash yourself, ok?
Yes - tell me when I stink and throw me in the shower if necessary
Yes - if I start saying mean things to you, throw me in a 'home'
No - don't feel guilty, cause you were a wonderful son
No - if your dad has died before me and I don't remember, then don't tell me the truth. I won't remember it anyhow
Yes - go to the doctor appts with me, cause I like to argue with drs.
No- don't have me live with you unless I can respect your space & need for privacy.
Yes - as soon as I start becoming clingy and whiny, tell me to 'buck up' & put my big girl pants on. This is life!
It will be kinda like an advance directive for when I lose my marbles so he won't have to go on a website like this looking for answers. :)