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2. Remove EVERYTHING from the bathroom she uses leaving only toilet paper that has no cardboard roll (you can buy it that way these days). Remove towels, packages of wipes, lotions, potions, medicine, everything in other words. So the only thing she can do in the bathroom is use the toilet. And the only thing she can flush down the toilet is her waste, the allotted toilet paper or the clothing she's wearing.
3.If she has to take a bowel movement, you'll have to accompany her into the bathroom with moistened wipes that you will figure out how to dispose of.
4. If she refuses to be accompanied into the bathroom, look into Memory Care Assisted Living for her right away. In most cases, Alzheimer's/Dementia reaches a point where the person can no longer be cared for in the home and needs a team of care givers around the clock, 24/7. Safety issues tend to also crop up, wandering at night, trying to cook in the kitchen, etc, that make the entire situation unmanageable.
I work in a Memory Care home & this morning I came in to find a very large pile of feces on the carpet in the resident hallway. Left there by a gentleman who often forgets where his toilet is and thinks it's perfectly fine to take a BM right there on the floor. Or on the upholstered chair in the living area. Again, dementia & ALzheimer's often reaches a point where in-home care is no longer feasible.
Best of luck!
This is a major problem for Memory Care facilities; I once spoke about this issue with the owner of my Mom’s memory care facility. Interestingly, he told me that it’s usually the male residents who pull this costly and disruptive trick.
I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this issue, but please know that you’re not alone and this is unfortunately very common with Alzheimer’s and memory- impaired people. You might call a few memory care facilities in your area and ask to speak with management about what additional measures they take for this issue.
Taking care of a parent with memory loss is difficult.
Her half bath toilet near the kitchen had an event resulting in a burst pipe and flooding downstairs in the finished basement. Turns out she kept believing she was out of toilet paper and used paper towels. She had plenty of toilet paper stockpiled in the upstairs bedroom.
I got there to witness the repair arranged by the neighbor. It required external repair under the concrete front door doorstep. The repair cost thousands.
Mom acted mildly concerned as if, "Really??? That happened because of me?"
Yep, that started the ball rolling to get the diagnosis and move her to assisted living memory care near me.
We put a signs up: "Doctor says do not flush your poop." That didn't work. We taped the toilet handle. That didn't work. I turned off the water below the toilet so the toilet wouldn't flush. That worked for a while, but dang if mom didn't figure out how to turn the water back on. She couldn't tie a shoelace anymore but was more than able to figure out the plumbing issue.
We kept with it, though, and eventually my mom got tired of, bored with, and/or disinterested in thwarting our efforts to monitor her BMs. The combination of signs and shutting off the water is what eventually worked.
Not exactly what you asked, but I guess what I'm saying is that just when you think you've found a solution, your mom may surprise you with a workaround. All you can do is laugh and try again. ;-)
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