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I can see where you are both sad and angry at MIL. She fooled you before. My question to you, and if you can honestly within yourself... In these last few years with her, did she show affection and appreciation for you? Anything to help balance that negative note of you? I'm wondering if she had changed her view of you after 10 years.
For now, just vent your anger, cry your tears (of both loss and anger). When you have passed these emotions, perhaps you can write a letter to her, and tell her what's in your mind. Then, if you a fireplace, take that letter and burn it. When doing this, push it away from you and at the same time say that you letting go the anger/betrayal. And burning it forever. What is done, is done. And know this, a higher power knows what you did from your heart. THAT has not gone unnoticed. Your works have not gone unnoticed. I'm so sorry. {{Hugs}}
But, the potential defamation never got oxygen. Maybe you were being watched all the time, but in that case the watchers will have observed that your behaviour was not only scrupulously correct but also loving.
So conclusions:
- no rhyme or reason to your MIL's comment, if it was her own;
- no certain knowledge that this was her idea, and not that of someone else who happened to be present when the notes were made;
- this is an administrative error;
- no harm came of it while your MIL was alive.
Don't let any harm come of it now. Mentally, scrunch up that page and throw it away. It was a clerical mistake.
I am so very sorry you ever had to find this out. I am glad you are ready to put it back in the past, and to move forward. It sounds like you had a relationship with your MIL that was as deep and meaningful as she was capable of. Bless you.
It is so bizarre that I think you really need to have a big laugh.
I'm the one who gets blamed for anything missing or misplaced and I no longer take it personally...though it still hurts and frustrates me....deep down I know my mom loves me.