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I agree with 195Austin, this is a business arrangement. It is all right to be cordial to a caregiver, but first and foremost they are hired to care for your parent. If they just want to sit and visit, or clean out the refrigerator, it's time to look for a new caregiver. I tend to hire more mature caregivers who have more experience and know what they are getting into.
On the flip side, be respectful to the caregiver by providing them a written list of duties, having supplies on hand so they can do their job (ie: cleaning supplies, rubber gloves, personal care items, etc.) and paying on time. I pay weekly....cuts down on paperwork too!
I usually get a good sense of a person just by interviewing them in person. Don't be afraid to ask the tough questions and be upfront about what your parent needs. You want to know BEFORE you hire someone if there is something that they would rather not do.
It's a tough job being either a family or paid caregiver. Mutual respect is absolutely necessary.
good luck on finding a caregiver.
We pay $19./hr if we use an agency. And anywhere between $12. - 15./hr when we hire privately.
Regardless, make sure you check references and meet this person. Also, check in on them once and awhile. Before you allow anyone into your family member's home, remove all valuables, cash, and important papers from their home and put them in a safe place....better safe than sorry.
good luck