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My mom is in survival mode...she sees me as someone who can take care of all her needs and that's it. It is sad to see this once vibrant woman decline...but I feel like I am declining too.
I can't tell friends about it - they glaze over in about 2 seconds (they don't even know about the really tough stuff.)
I had a major melt down yesterday...but does it count if no one is around to hear it?
The only thing that seems to help is to do something creative and positive - even if it is a little thing. It gets me up in the morining.
good luck,
Lilli
Tom
Since my moms been sick it is like I've been sick too. We were just that close and for the life of me I am just now starting to slowly get back to the things I've neglected for so long. It took me forever to thoroughly clean my house and organize, well still working on the organizing. I am a seamstress but it took me until recently, and a whole lot of calls from clients to get back to my sewing machine. Normally I would get up early to fix my hair, but instead I did a hang on your shoulders curly rippled fro, (pix). I'm a roller skater and instead of skating I didn't even look at my skates until about 5 days ago (I actually got them out and cleaned them up and am going skating Saturday.
When mom got sick I didn't have time to do these things but when my sister took over I did but I had no get up and go as if my entire world had just been pulled out from under me. It was as though I'd lost my self esteem, heck I even gained 8 lbs. and believe me that ain't me. That's goin too soon as I get back on these skates and get back to my skating competitions. (I might be 50 but I'll be darned if I'm gonna let those 20 yr olds out do me in those leotards, even if mine are MADE OF "HOLD ME IN STRETCH MATERIALS" (hahahaha). Of course there's my NBA which I never give up on and that takes me away a lot of the times.
It's almost as if your grieving.
I started gardening and that has done wonders for me and my sanity. It's given me a new sense of worth and excellence if you will. It has reinstated my confidence and Lord knows I needed that.
Do you garden? any hobbies that are long overdue.