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My cousin is gay, living on the other coast. I worry about him because all his family is on the other coast. He is also getting to the age family members started showing signs of ALZ. One his mother. He is alone so no one nearby to see the signs.
We really should start worrying about old age when we are young.
Unfortunately I am an only child with limited extended family, but I do have to say watching how my friends have handled such situations having family support is awesome. Their entire family has gotten together to help provide care either in terms of money or time. When possible the village approach does seem ideal.
Just it is sometimes not possible. Does beg the question once more people learn about trusts and stuff will states be able to sustain Medicaid going forward.
So, I followed my late parents plan to save for a rainy day, like days where it is really pouring. I plan to hire professional caregivers to help me to start off with, then move into Assisted Living which offers Memory Care. At least I would be around people from my generation and have common interest :)
For those who savings are limited, thank goodness for Medicaid where Medicaid will pay for a skilled nursing facility.
Overall, imho, I think we cannot--ANY of us-- depend on family.
I have zero intention of doing so and this has been long discussed.
I will be going into care when needed; meanwhile I and my partner, then one or the other of us (he's 84 and I am 82) will be living independently at home, then with help hired in while that works, then in care.
I would say that it is now rare and will become MUCH MORE RARE for family to take on the care of elders. That's my guess.
So I would say it is about community, community, community, and that is one thing you have a head start on.
I am not overly close and he did not even bother to show up to my dad's funeral so he probably will die alone.
Guess what I am saying is maintain healthy relationships with others in your community make lasting bonds so at the very least you are not alone at the end.
Me not being in that community I see this all though my community also. I know so many single , divorced, men and women, some with kids, some without, but honestly, I don't see that there really is anyone for them to take care of them when and if they need it.
Honestly there is new trend, happening that many many families are breaking away from each other more than ever.
I can honestly say about 5 percent of the people I know will have someone to help them when they can't help themselves. 95 percent, should start figuring out there plans.
As for me, I have 4 boys, scattered around US, all living there best life, no way in heck am I going to disrupt there lives to take care of me, even if they want to.
I didn't have them to be my aging slave.
So I really don't think your community is any different from mine.
We had children, my childrens job is to live there best life, not to deal with me.