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You're in a tough situation. Your Mom is terrified of losing her independence and needs to have control which she used to have before the dementia started.
I have had talks with my Mom about this many times and she tells me with an open heart that she misses driving, misses all the aspects of her life that she "used" to have control over. She even jokes (at 94) and tells me she would like to get a job.
To this day she will wash the dishes (it makes her feel good) and when she's not looking I re-wash them because she doesn't clean them totally which of course she can't help.
As others suggested I have tried finding candy or any sugar looking pill that looked similar to my Mom's meds but my Mom knew the difference, I could not fool her. Then her dementia progressed so she's fine now with me giving her medications. She stopped fighting me but it took a long time.
I really don't have any advice for you except try to have a heart to heart talk with her. Tell her you don't enjoy being in control that you are just trying to help her, not hurt her.
Best to you,
Jenna
give her the medication as you have been but just take it from the "real" bottle.
If she says she already took it just try to convince her that the one you are trying to give her is for something else, a vitamin maybe. ...(I see someone mentioned the TicTac...sorry)
Personally...how out of control is her BP? is it truly critical that she take it? I guess what I am getting at is at some point particularly with dementia is it really that important to keep medicating? Same with cholesterol medications and some others. You might want to discuss it with the doctor at some point.
I have heard of pill systems that you load and they dispense with an alarm at a certain time. If you did that you could call or come by at that time to make sure they were taken, but she would still have ownership of the pills. That might be a compromise, at least at this point in her dementia.
It's difficult because as our parents age they keep losing the independence they once had (driving, shopping, cooking, etc.) and it's a difficult transition to going from being independent to having depend on someone else.
Again, just be firm and explain that you care or love her and don't want to see her harming herself.