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When she developed early dementia, I contacted the atty and we redid some of the original documents and set up a trust. She'd been talking about giving us money again, but I stopped that. He put her condo into a life estate and I was able to close her CDs when they matured, and put them in the trust. IF she could've stayed in the condo long enough, it would've reduced cap gains on sale, but she refused to let aides in and we had to move her to MC. Cost of keeping it was expensive, so I worked on clearing, cleaning and repairing so we could sell it. Most of the $ went into checks for us (Remaindermen), but we put it all back into the trust, taking back enough to pay the cap gains we were assessed. Her share also penalized her for Medicare, as they also have a look back - tax guy says this will revert back again next year, as her income is back to "normal."
The benefit to this, IMO, was to protect her assets from herself or scams. It's in an awesome management such that despite taking so much every month to cover the cost of MC (even more before condo sale), if you look at the 2 year graph, it's like we haven't touched it! There will be plenty for her care for years to come (she's 97 now, almost through 4 yrs of MC!)
What I wasn't aware of is the "plan" was to protect the assets and use Medicaid, should she ever need a NH. After the condo sale, the atty told me to contact him if/when she needed a NH and he'd help apply for Medicaid. So, apparently the goal was to protect the assets to leave something for us. Nice as it would be, that is HER money and should be for HER care. I made my decision to NOT call if she moved to NH. Turns out in discussion with her MC is that she won't need to move. She has DNR, doesn't want excessive treatment, etc. She recently had a stroke, but even if she becomes bed-ridden, she can stay! It was my preference to not have to move her, so it sounds good for now! Even if she did have to move, my plan is to pay for the NH from HER funds. Anything left, great. If not, so be it.
As I noted to rovana's comment, there is "talk" of changing the "rules" so that the 5 year lookback is either extended or eliminated, to prevent this kind of inheritance "saving." Of note also, many insurance companies have gotten out of or plan to eliminate further LTC policies, as they are not profitable, esp when people can live for MANY years in LTC! If you have one now, make sure the ins co is still solvent, and if you plan to get one, make sure it is a co that is big enough to "ride the storm."
So, estate planning CAN be beneficial for a spouse or disabled LO, but really shouldn't be used to avoid paying for LTC and depleting the Medicaid program. In many cases on this forum, there are those who don't have enough savings or income, who aren't trying to hide anything, but need care. Then it's legit recommendation.
i made sure my POA (I have no children) knows that I absolutely don’t want to be on Medicaid if at all possible. I’ve seen three on-Medicaid seniors crammed in a small room in a skilled nursing home. That’s not how I want to live out my last days! I have no idea why folks want to do estate planning so their life savings go to their heirs and the government pays the tab for their care. The three-to-a-room is probably not what they imagine when thinking the government will take care of them. It was horrifying to see three elderly men (all groaning in pain in a facility short on help) with a foot of space between each bed. They were a miserable lot. So sad! Seniors with any means should use their savings and investments for their own care if at all possible. Plan ahead! Senior care can be costlier than college! I feel for those who must depend on the government for assistance. Some will get good care, but others will get very little. Breaks my heart.
Medicaid should be for those who truly need it, those who never had the opportunity to save enough for the high cost of care. But, those who blow through it aren't denied necessarily. It isn't fair to those who were responsible, but life isn't always fair, is it? It's just sad that we ALL pay for those who use Medicaid (through our taxes) and when those who COULD have saved, without scrimping, didn't and use it, it takes away from those who really need it!
Tholden627 says:
"The one I care about is my younger brother who is disabled. I just want her to have a comfortable life. Definitely going to look in the home trust, because I wouldn’t want the state to decide how much it’s worth"
THAT is a legitimate reason for doing estate planning and setting up proper trusts. By doing so, your mother has ensured he will be cared for in the future, better care than he would likely get via Medicaid. Your mom was a wise woman at the time, to look ahead and be concerned for your brother!
"As for my brother, my mom back in 2016 worked Thoroughly with a very prominent special-needs lawyer/ estate planner.
He has proper trusts set up for him with me as POA, Got all the proper assessments so he could qualify for certain funding, as well as Medicaid and Social Security.
When my mom started to decline, his plan went on the back burner, so I had to rummage through notes to figure out what she did. After some digging, I was able to pick it back up with social workers and after five months of working hard he’s getting very close to having his future set."
You clearly learned a few things from your mother, picking up the pieces and making sure her wishes for his care come true! If he lives in the same home with your mother, Medicaid can't take the house while he's still alive/living there. It would likely be best to set up something with the attys such that Medicaid can't take it, if possible to do that now.
Can't fit everything in here, so I'm going to post what we did next.
My mom is going to stay in her home as long as she can. If she had to go to a facility we would definitely sell her home while she is still alive. That money would continue to cover her care if needed, and if it’s possible to put some aside for my brother in his special needs trust.
I was talking to a financial planner about that to make sure it’s set up right because I want whatever comes from the home to still belong to her.
Thats the next step! Trying to do things in increments, because I have A baby due in December.
My prayers are with you for getting everything sorted and finalized for your mom and brother.
Remember yourself as you deal with all of this. Taking time off when you need a break is so important, take care of you so you can be the best you for them.
You are doing a great job! Well done!
Parents should not have to provide for adult children.
Louisiana used to have ‘forced heir ship’ laws. I’m glad that was voted out awhile back.
It was her money, my father had made it, and that’s what he would have wanted.
Had she lived much longer, she would have gone on Medicaid after all of her assets were expended.
I never regretted handling the situation as I did.
I have saved for my retirement and I have purchased Long Term Care Insurance just so that I can make decisions about who cares for me and where.
Most people have not taken steps to do so.
For some odd reason so many people want to "pass the house on" to a family member. So a house is put in a Trust so that it can not be used as an asset to provide the care one needs.
They want to pass on all the money that they have saved for "their retirement and old age" well guess what it is time to use that savings for what you intended.
"WE" put so much on possessions that we fail to see that the very things that we have can help provide for better care.
Use what she has to provide the BEST care she can currently afford.
When and if the funds run out then you can begin the process of applying for Medicaid. But until then let her have the best that she can afford.
Although when looking for a place if you are going to have to place her in a Facility look for one that will also have Medicaid beds should she need one. A resident that has been "private pay" for a number of years will have a better chance of getting one of the Medicaid beds that the facility has.
I don't understand why seniors who no longer live in a house would want to keep it. Unless there is a special tax circumstance upon transfer that applies (for instance, California Proposition 13 situation.) Or if the senior owns a very valuable, historical property and one of the kids wants to live/work there (for instance a farm or vineyard property.) Otherwise, keeping an unused residential property is just a money pit.
My folks' house was paid off, and my dad did an excellent job of saving and investing for their retirement, so now that my mother is in memory care, she's able to pay for it with existing funds. However, it also costs more than twice what she and my dad were living on when it was the two of them at home. It's costing her about $150,000 a year now between her nursing home bills and her medical expenses.
Not a lot of people can afford that for too many years, so I'm sure that's why there's usually a discussion of Medicaid.
Many people are looking for ways to hustle the system and get a fat inheritance while their parents are put in a nursing home and many times just forgotten.
I can't personally imagine worrying about getting the house I want and was promised if it meant that my loved one had to go on welfare for me to receive it. But it takes all kinds to make the world go round.
Because your mom has a disabled dependent adult child I highly recommend that you go to www.nelf.org and find a certified elder law attorney in your area and have them help you. He needs to be protected as much as mom, they will be able to help you ensure that he is taken care of in the event that mom no longer can.
I was cheering your post, hustling the system is a hot button for me. I have seen people that needed the aid and could not qualify while others that didn't need it shielded their assets to qualify. The lack of integrity that takes is gut wrenching and the ones that suffer are the ones that didn't have anything to hide.
God bless you on your journey, may you find a great attorney and be filled with strength and wisdom.
As for my brother, my mom back in 2016 worked Thoroughly with a very prominent special-needs lawyer/ estate planner.
He has proper trusts set up for him with me as POA, Got all the proper assessments so he could qualify for certain funding, as well as Medicaid and Social Security.
When my mom started to decline, his plan went on the back burner, so I had to rummage through notes to figure out what she did. After some digging, I was able to pick it back up with social workers and after five months of working hard he’s getting very close to having his future set.
I’m on the homestretch for that!! wish us luck in that category as well!
My husband and I have saved from the beginning of our marriage for our retirement. And many times we saved, when it would have been more fun to spend. Now that we’re retired we have the money to maintain our same lifestyle, maintain our house, pay for future care when needed, and hopefully do some travel.
If you want give away money do it earlier Same with transferring ownership of a house.
That came after a LIFETIME of care and savings. It was what we had been taught as young kids. A part of our allowances had to go to charity and to savings a long time before Dave Ramsey saw the light of day.
But even WITH all of that, not everyone has the opportunity or the "larning" to save for age. And the costs are high. I so agree with you. A million billion times easier to spend. The funniest part is if you end where he did, with having saved all his years (in the Army he was called the banker, because he sent money home and still had enough to lend, interest free, to his mates before payday) you get told that you were "lucky". Ummmmm.
The money we have saved is to go towards our care. But if I planned on staying where I am, I would put my home in a Trust. Because having my Moms home to care for and having Medicaid involved with how much I could sell it for was part of my stress. With a Trust my girls could do what they wanted with the house.
You are correct. Moms money should be used on Mom. Maybe for a nice AL. Medicaid only covers LTC facilities. ALs maybe after private paying for a period of time. When your on Medicaid (its not a coverage) you are basically poor. SS and pensions are used to offset the cost of care. Before my Moms death and just after she was placed on Medicaid, she was put into a 4 bed room. TG she wasn't kept in there all day.
When you protect your money that just means your beneficiaries profit from your savings. Me, I want to live my life out comfortably. I hope we have enough saved for a nice AL. I do not want to be in a NH for the rest of my life so my children reap the rewards of my hard work when there were other options I could have afforded.
Definitely feel like your mindset is how My mom was envisioning this.
I could care less if any of this is left to us at the end, The one I care about is my younger brother who is disabled. I just want her to have a comfortable life. Definitely going to look in the home trust, because I wouldn’t want the state to decide how much it’s worth
OF NECESSITY they need Medicaid. Trust me, there is a good deal of difference in where you can go and what care you can receive from having adequate savings to having non and being at the mercy of the taxpayer. It is nothing someone would choose.
We do see on Forum a FEW instances of people trying to hide their assets, gift homes to children, come up with some scheme with some laywer, and then try to get taxpayer funding through medicaid, but it is RARE as hen's teeth. We see more who mistakenly gifted to children, paid for college, a down payment on home, and then the funds were gone when they were needed.
You are so correct in that we should all save everything we can for our own care when we are aged, and that is how those funds should be spent.
As to information packets you are handed, they are usually freebies handed to EVERYONE whether they need it or not. It is public information provided by providers.
I do believe that education around the rules for qualification is very important. Not a week goes by that there is not a new post from someone looking for help, but the family is within the look back period, because Mum sold the house, moved in with the kids and gave each of the kids a lump sum of money. That sounded good until dementia set in, or Dad had a stroke and needs 24/7 care.
Many people make grand promises, “the house goes to my daughter, the car to my grandson...”, without considering the consequences of their actions.
I know for my former mil, being able to leave money to her sons for her is a sign of success. She grew up incredibly poor.,
I hope your dad is doing all right.