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These services may be covered. You may feel that having a CNA come in for bathing regularly is a good idea.
Caretaking is a marathon, emotionally and physically. Once in a while a break, especially with a challenging task like bathing, will help you both immensely.
Stay by the shower to make sure she does'nt fall or hurt herself. You may get wet if you need to help.
I have to do this for my 88 yr old aunt that has dementia. She can bath herself, I just have to tell her what to do each step of bathing. It's a slow process but can be accomplish. Just a bit of patience is required
#1 Shower seat
#2 Walk-in tub addition if costs permit
#3 Bed bath with tub of warm, soapy water
A bed bath is another option, and much safer for you both, and can be less embarrassing for her, since most of her is covered all the time. The method is on YouTube.
For me, I have to be naked in the shower with him, otherwise my clothes will be wet. I then wash myself quickly while he is drying himself.
talking during the whole process seemed to help. Talk about the bathing, what clothing is going to be put on, even politics. this helped to relax us.
A separate dry towel to wrap in until drying is finished.
We had a step in tub that she loved and would play in for at least an hour.
I allowed her to wash her private areas, her face, and whatever else she could reach and I got to do the rest.
It was mentioned about not using soap around the vagina because of infections. I would use the anti-bacterial hand soap to clean followed by a feminine wipe to clean her there as needed during the day. No infections ever.
Don't forget the hugs afterwards. they seem to warm thing up good. And they are fun.
Good luck
https://www.google.com/search?source=hp&ei=71L_Xq_FF9H0tAbtu7rgDQ&q=no+rinse+products&oq=no+rinse+products&gs_lcp=CgZwc3ktYWIQAzICCAAyBggAEBYQHjIGCAAQFhAeMgYIABAWEB4yBggAEBYQHjIGCAAQFhAeMgYIABAWEB46BQgAELEDOgUIABCDAVD8BliRFmClF2gAcAB4AIABUIgB5QiSAQIxN5gBAKABAaoBB2d3cy13aXo&sclient=psy-ab&ved=0ahUKEwjv-PT5trHqAhVROs0KHe2dDtwQ4dUDCAw&uact=5#spf=1593791219216
I recently used the no rinse soap from a hospital visit when plumbing problems arose at home, and I felt just as clean as if I had showered. Shampooing takes a bit more effort if long hair is involved, but it's still better than navigating the bathroom dynamics.
2. More discussions on no rinse products can be found in some of these threads: Here are links to several threads on the topic of bathing an elder (some may be duplicates, as the search topic is close in parameters):
https://www.agingcare.com/search?term=no+rinse+bath+products
https://www.agingcare.com/search?term=showers%2c+no+rinse+products
3. A poster named Maggie Marshall, who no longer posts here, had some good ideas. Turn bathing into something more of a salon visit than an ordeal. Play your wife's favorite music or do something relaxing before hand. Let her use a no rinse product and wash as much of her body as she can, so she doesn't feel helpless, and/or losing her ability to care for herself.
If you have a dryer, warm up a few towels and keep them handy so she doesn't become chilled, especially in winter.
If you enjoy cool drinks such as lemonade, take a break for some refreshment. Play favorite CDs during the process.
4. Turn bathing from a challenging task into a renewal of your marital closeness, a re-acquaintance and time for the two of you to just relax. It can be done, and it a lot easier than the often unpleasant bathroom tangos. But mood priming is important.
Good luck.
AND thanks to original poster for posing a question I am also figuring out!
I have gained so much knowledge and support here. I wish everyone well. What times we live in. What journeys we are on!
Making the bathing experience comfortable and with no fear of slipping is very important. A senior can have a near miss in the tub and then refuse to bathe again.
Also, plenty of grab bars!! Those things are golden if you're stuck in the tub! I'm only 63, but I want DH to install grab bars this summer. Better safe than sorry!.
And since mother only showers twice a week, she has very gentle body washes, rather than a harsh deodorant soap.
The few times I helped mother bathe, we kept the shower head pointed away from me, and I draped a towel over my shoulders. I didn't come away totally unscathed, but I wasn't dripping wet.
Oh, and have a pile of thick, soft towels on hand to dry her. Many srs cannot take quick temperature changes.
There are shower chairs where the seat slides out of the tub. The person sits and then you can slide the seat into the tub.