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Mom gets extremely anxious if dad leaves the house. He is her primary caregiver so she is concerned about not being able to reach him or know if something happens. Example, he went to go get a haircut this morning and I had to go over earlier than I normally do so she wouldn't be alone. But if he goes to do laundry or use the gym in the building she doesn't worry as much. He likes to walk outside but now that makes her too anxious.
I'm getting them both set up with lifeline devices this hopefully will alleviate some of that worry. Dad says he does not need one but I told him to suck it up. Plus it will count his steps so he liked that (he's a firecracker). She gets extremely upset with herself if she makes a mistake or can't immediately fix something like the TV was "frozen" the other day and I guess she freaked out with my dad until I came over (was, super proud of myself for googling the error code and fixing it lol!) . Or she clicked the wrong address for an Amazon shipment and called me to come over (she realized she could cancel and start over...)
Anyway MiaMoor your comments were super helpful in particular. I sense she is fearing becoming more dependent and worried about the "what if's" understandably so. I've told her I've made dozens of mistakes using Amazon and if it weren't for my techie husband I could barely operate my TV. This world isn't designed to be easy. However many of her reactions have been outsized and a change for her so hopefully "early" intervention will help. I hope she can teach mom some skills for being more gentle with herself and letting go of perfectionism and accepting the both/and of life. Her cognition still is fine, memory long and short term, conversing etc. We went to see her great granddaughter yesterday and it was a beautiful visit involving a car ride and a formula feed at my nephew's (I'm normalizing bringing the crap with us! We had our lunch and so did the baby and so did she!!)
Samad1 yes the hospital does a number on a person for sure, she is also getting over the trauma of her 9 day stay in March and the trauma of reinsertion of the feeding tube she thought she was done with... She did complete a course of antibiotics for potential UTI. Thanks again group it's helpful for me to write it out and I'll update more.
UTI, I think is the more important element to watch. Even the slightest levels of E. coli or any other bacteria will grow to a full-blown infection over a short period of time. In our loved ones, there may be no other symptoms like fever.
Look for another external culprit; Pain, skin rash, flu, upset stomach, constipation, and the like as well.
Psychiatric problems in my view should be at the end of the long list of potential problems. Find a way of making sure she takes her Lexapro, in pudding, ice cream, etc. Check with your pharmacist to ascertain that you can actually powder the pill.
This was before her dementia had progressed significantly. Now, it seems that it was part of her cognitive decline. I'm glad that she is passed that phase, as the low level dose of antidepressants (which was all her GP was happy to prescribe, due to possible interactions with other meds) weren't helping that much.
I'm not saying that your mum is in cognitive decline, but she has been through trauma, which also affects how our brains work.
Yes, it's important to look into the cause but, in the meantime, try and help relieve the symptoms. Simply counteracting your mum's fears probably won't be enough to allay them.
Be reassuring, but try not to belittle your mum's anxieties. Instead, use distraction techniques to move your mum out of the anxiety loop.
After reassurance, change the subject and find a brighter topic of discussion. Encourage your mum to engage in activities with other people, so that she doesn't get stuck inside her own head.
Turn your mum's thoughts towards others, such as helping out with any fundraising or anything that helps other people.
Look into building resilience and see if there's anything that can help your mum to realise that she's stronger than she thinks - she's got this far in life without breaking into pieces, she'll cope with whatever else comes along.
I do hope that your Mum feels better soon.
If not, this could have to do with medications, or a need for medications or a need for diagnostic workup, but anything we say here is pure guess work. Ultimately this needs to be in the hands of your loved one's medical team. I wish you luck with finding out what's going on.
Abruptly stopping Lexapro is a very bad idea, if that's what she's done. Weaning off slowly is necessary to avoid side effects too numerous to mention.
Best of luck.
I would check out Teepa Snow on YouTube, see if you see any other symptoms of dementia.
One other suggestion if your thinking UTI, would be a sinus infection. My mom was really off for a while, then she got really stuff, after giving her antibiotics for sinus infection, her cognitive decline improved