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6 weeks before her death she walked with a walker, ate pretty good, knew my name but she started to refuse meds.
5 weeks or so she started getting very agitated and suspicious of everyone.
4 weeks she got “asymptomatic covid”.
3 weeks she started to refuse food. It was difficult to get her to eat anything. 2 weeks she was diagnosed as “failure to thrive” and did not know my name, 1 weeks she was still walking to the bathroom with a walker.
3 days she was in bed and could not get up.
She took her meds the day before she died.
The day she died she had terminal agitation. Very hard day.
She did have congestive heart failure. The death certificate reflected vascular dementia.
I guess I am rehearsing the info and trying to answer something that is impossible to answer. She did not decline with the typical dementia symptoms. I know vascular can be abrupt and in steps.
Perhaps I need to call my counselor again. Trying to figure this quick decline out is driving me crazy.
No question here, just curious.
I am not a Doctor, have no medical training & didn't know your Mom. But I'd blame Covid. Asymptomatic or not. No symptoms like runny nose, sore throat, fever - but - what havoc was being caused internally? Inflamation? Brain? Lungs?
I've seen Covid cause delerium time & time again (just as it does with UTI, pneumonia & other infections). Delerium causing confusion, disrupted sleep, disrupted or refusal to eat, agitation, memory deficits. That's how your weeks 5,4,3,2 read to me. Delerium. Weeks 2-1 could be the disease itself turning more severe.
I have three elderly relatives severely effected by Covid. Two never cognitively the same after Covid, now worsened memory. Another required all heart values replaced.
For sure speak to a councellor if it helps. Sadly, we don't always find answers to all our questions.
Passing 'with Covid' as one of the factors is a natural death in my book. I hope you can find peace going forward.
Her decline was fairly steady throughout those years. When there was a crisis -- medical or my dad's death -- she took a deep dive and never quite came back cognitively to where she'd been before. The isolation during Covid did a huge number on her as far as knowing me, my brother, or the grandchildren, and I don't think she ever did know quite who I was from that point on. It didn't help that she couldn't see either, so my visits to her window were largely for my benefit, not hers.
She was in the hospital for two weeks in December 2020 and went on hospice care on January 1, 2021. She never ate solid food again -- she had no interest, not swallowing issues -- and her cognition continued to decline steadily. She had an imaginary husband who moved into her brain immediately after my dad's death, and even he slowly faded away.
She died peacefully in her sleep seven months after going on hospice. The official cause was dementia, but I think it was heart failure.
The final cause of death will always be some type of organ failure. Alzheimers would be an underlying cause.
In all probability the person with Vascular dementia will most likely have a major stroke that will cause their death.
I think my Husband had both Alzheimer's and Vascular Dementias.
He would literally go from being able to do something one day to not being able to do it the next day. I could almost pinpoint each big decline he had as he would have a fall just before the decline. (never hit his head they were controlled "falls")
I think each of these were strokes.
He was a sweet man, but his moods reflected my moods. If I was angry with him, he would "dig his heels in" and not do anything I asked. If I stayed calm even, though my head was exploding, he would cooperate. During the last week of his life, he was unable to swallow or walk.
He was a wonderful husband, father, and grandfather. I miss him every day and very much regret the times I was angry with him. Just remember this is your loved one and the person you knew is pretty much gone. There are still good days, but they are different. Remeber the good days, forget the ones that were not.
Take care of yourself. Get some help if you can. This is a wonderful forum to vent and get advice from others in the same place as you. ((((( Hugs to you)))).
I went on a vacation for two weeks and came back. She had clearly declined. I pointed this out to my brother. He said, no, she was fine. I held my peace.
A few days later he called and said, I see what you mean...
A day after that, her aide was assisting her in the bathroom, gave her the same instructions as always, to hold on. But mom didn't hold on to the bar this time.
Catastrophic fall. We put her on hospice and she died a few days later.
When she had her wits about her, mom quite explicitly said she never wanted to live with dementia. So I did not do anything to prolong her life.
My brother insisted on asking mom if she wanted a pacemaker to which she said yes to. Couldn't fight that.
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