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It is natural to wonder WHY? With all three, it seemed a different reason. Grandma just seemed to need something to collect to help her feel secure. Neighbor just needed something in her hands. Mom, the one with Alzheimers, I pondered long and hard about. I concluded that the paper in the bathroom usage had much to do with the state of Mom's consciousness. Her world was reduced to the moment, to the immediate. I theorized that when Mom went to the bathroom, she would forget that she had already wiped, so she did it again...and again...and again.
We also removed all tissue from the bathrooms, setting a roll in a closed cabinet nearby for family members, but only a few sheets doled out to Mom whenever she had to go. This worked well, but it required that one of us be almost constantly available to Mom to do so.
I too, welcomed the incontinence when it finally arrived. Little did I know that changing would then become a terrible bone of contention between Mom and me. So, be careful what you wish for. You may just get it.
The toilet tissue phase lasted a good four or five years in our family. We all had to get used to the routine of handing Mom some tissue on the way to the bathroom, or bringing some to her if she got there before we did. In the end, one of us had to always accompany her for she forgot where the bathroom was and once there, sometimes forget what was supposed to be done there. BM in the late stages became the same problem and often feces went on the floor instead of in the toilet.
Not everyone goes through all of these stages of course, but maybe hearing about it and how common it is will help someone else. I don't know why we have to try to find a reason for everything, but that is how we are hooked up. I just always tried to imagine how it would be if I could not remember anything from one moment to the next.
I sure wish I had found this forum long ago. Keep up all the good work, posters. WE need each other!
I totally agree with having to check all his pockets before doing the laundry or I will have a blizzard of white paper. I think as the youngest of 10 growing up right after the depression, his behavior is understandable. I try to pick up any scrap that he leaves for later and may need to buy him some "special", thicker toilet tissue. I do have moist flushable wipes for him, but he rarely uses them.
In her room, however, she cuts open the boxes of tissues and stacks the tissue in various places around her room and bathroom. While I think it's unsanitary, again, I have other things to worry about. It does make be a little crazy.
The issue that makes me really crazy is the refusing to put the toilet paper, used, in the toilet. She insists on putting it in the waste basket. I think this goes back to living in a house with septic.
Thanks for letting me share with others who can relate. :)
In her room, however, she cuts open the boxes of tissues and stacks the tissue in various places around her room and bathroom. While I think it's unsanitary, again, I have other things to worry about. It does make be a little crazy.
The issue that makes me really crazy is the refusing to put the toilet paper, used, in the toilet. She insists on putting it in the waste basket. I think this goes back to living in a house with septic.
Thanks for letting me share with others who can relate. :)
Something else my dad does is that he now no longer sit up straight at the table. He leans back in his chair and wants to bring the food on this long road :) all the way to his mouth from the table. Naturally he drops some of it on his clothes and its yet another thing one has to deal with. Its all so strange seeing him do this though. when I was growing up he was quite strict on table manners, so its almost funny now.
Shame yesterday, he showered in the morning because my sister told him to and it used to be a bit of a mission, now its become a little easier , I mean a little, but when she got home late afternoon, she noticed him wearing the same clothes/pajamas, which has become his day-wear and she told him again to shower. She was told this morning by the help that he did shower in the morning and she felt quite bad about getting him to shower again after he had told her that he did. That's when one feels bad and yet most of the time it can be quite taxing. ooh!
The other is napkins I go thru a pile at dinner just like eating with a child I have to wipe her hands and pick food off her clothes. I also have to take her plate away as soon as she is finished because it bugs her and she doesn't know what to do with it. She insists on wiping her plate yet more napkins.
try to accept the mind is damaged. Forget about rational responses. we can run ourselves ragged trying to rationalize the irrational behaviors
Easy to say, impossible to live with .."Take a BREAK often | You get to start o