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You've gotten some very good advice here. I'd like to add one more piece: try to remember that there are TWO lives here that have been affected by your husband's diagnosis of AD. Not just HIM. There's YOU to consider too. TWO lives have been irrevocably altered. His disease is terminal. You, however, do not have a terminal disease, thank God, so please don't neglect yourself while caring for HIM and wind up with one.
Memory Care ALs are popping up on every street corner in the USA for a reason. As dementia & AD increase daily, exhausted, worn out & sick caregivers wind up with no other choice but to place their loved ones and save TWO lives in the process by doing so: the loved one and herself. You can visit daily if you'd like, once covid is under control. Please consider going back to being a wife instead of a caregiver.
Wishing you the best of luck moving forward.
For me, I would get the tremors helping my parents. And even though my folks have passed on, I still have those tremors. I could kick myself when years ago my primary doctor asked me to take xanax [or similar] to help take the edge off, but I didn't want to take any pills. Today, I am taking them :P
Is there any way you could budget for one shift of caregiving to help your husband, mainly to help "you"? Please note that up to 40% of family caregivers die leaving behind the love one they were caring. Those are not good odds. Then what? Who would be there to help hubby, or will he need to go into a Memory Care facility?
Even if you put hubby into Memory Care, you will still be his caregiver, but at least you can go home and get a restful sleep. Once covid-19 is over, you could visit with him as much as you like.
No one truly knows how stressful caregiving is unless they have walked in your shoes.
I had heart palpitations and extremely high blood pressure during my caregiving days.
I admit that I have never been a big eater but I got to a point that I couldn’t even eat. I’m small and can’t afford to lose weight.
It became unbearable to never have a break.
I will tell you something that I experienced while I was trying to explain my emotions to a therapist.
My emotions had been built up for so long. I actually broke out in hives!
My therapist said to me that when stress starts to manifest in our bodies, we are experiencing overload!
My doctor told me that my physical state was a warning to take care of myself or have a heart attack or stroke.
Consider yourself warned. You have a LOT on your plate. Please reassess your situation and adjust accordingly.
Take care, my friend.
And consider if his care has become too much to handle in a home setting. I wish you both peace
I have several friends who were caregivers for their spouses and died before the one they were caring for. I attribute it to the stress of it all and not having the time or energy to care for themselves.
Find what works for you and take care of yourself.
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