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My Uncle George was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer at 98; the 'slow growing kind', which I never heard of. He just turned 100. He's done nothing about the cancer, and it hasn't killed him yet.
My motto is this: allow the very elderly to live what's left of their lives in peace and with as little pain & trauma as possible. If this issue is causing your mother pain, and the procedure will not cause her more pain than it cures, go ahead. If not, don't do it.
Good luck!
It's always OK to say no to doctors. It doesn't occur to them to let you know that's an option. Ask if there are other options, but unnecessary procedures should be pretty low on the list.
It would probably kill her to go thru it.
Juse keep her comfortable.
My Dad will be 97 next month and when he ended up in the Hospital because he couldn't urinate, they wanted to do all kinds of tests on him and the only thing I let them do is put a Cathiter in him and give him fluids for being dehydrated and antibiotics.
I told them No to all procedures and Test they cane up with because I told them no reason to do tests because he was too old fir any procedure.
I guess it's just their job (Hospital) Policy, to ask you to do these things like going thru a Drive Thru and have them ask if you want fries or a pie with your order.
When you go to a Hospital, you most definitely need an Advicate.
PS The gynaecologist would be very wrong not to *offer* the full range of options. Explain them to your mother as clearly as possible and as much as she's able to understand, and give her a choice in what happens next.
My mom, 91, with dementia, had a prolapse and got a pessary a few years ago. It had to be taken out and cleaned by a nurse practitioner on a regular basis -which Mom hated. Being in stirrups, she was very uncomfortable (emotionally)with the whole situation.
We had the pessary removed for the last time and kept out after Mom broke her back. She was no longer ambulatory the way she was, and the prolapse works with gravity. Now she spends most of her days seated or laying down and it hasn't been an issue.
Also, she's had 4 skin cancers and we've stopped taking her for check up on those things. Because, why? Same as you, we're not going to put her through any kind of surgery or aggressive treatments, she doesn't want that either. So why put her through the visit. The going out somewhere she's unfamiliar with for something she doesn't entirely understand to be seen by someone she will probably not remember. It just ruins the whole day.
Unless she is bothered by the prolapse, at 97, I'd skip the pessary (which would also mean multiple follow up visits) and the biopsy. I only opt for Mom's comfort as a priority these days.
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