By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
The security of owning a home has many benefits.
My mother once advised to bloom where you are planted.
The cost of renting can actually be more than the taxes yearly and maintenance of a home. Costs you can control, vs. renting expense controlled by the landlord with rules. This can be calculated for the future.
A job in your future might be fun and bring more friends into your life, while still collecting SS.
The home may increase in value.
I sold a home, moved around a lot, bought a condominium, then sold that. Nothing was as comfortable as my former home, now valued at over a million. Any investments like stock market would have failed, looking back on the economy, over time.
I am so sorry that you have lost both your husband and son recently especially during the Coronavirus pandemic when everything is exponentially more difficult
to deal with!
First of all, like others who have given their thoughts - it is never a good idea to make major decisions during the grieving process. It is very difficult to think clearly at this time which is why you are feeling "perplexed" on what to do. Moving in and of itself is difficult - this would be too many changes to handle at one time. It just seems like you have too many irons in the fire right now to be in any kind of hurry. I knew a woman your age in a support group who lost her husband and the very next week she told the group she was going to sell their house and move into an apartment. She was halfway through the process and then changed her mind - she realized it was too much, too fast and she loved their home as well as the community. Also, my mom was 79 when my dad passed away. Their house was paid for and she too was on social security, Medicare and had some other miscellaneous income. She ended up living there until she was 90. She had no other family living here other than my husband and I. In 2015 I sold her house in order to pay for her rent at an assisted living facility and currently at 95 she is in memory care.
I would think the priority as others here also mentioned would be to get your affairs in order if you are concerned about what will happen to you when you become unable to care for yourself so that the state would not be in charge. Taking care of that alone would relieve some of the burden you are carrying. I know people like to think this would only be an issue for an older person but, none of us regardless of age are guaranteed a "tomorrow" and technically, we all should have these things in place.
If you still feel like pursuing the idea, maybe you could sit down and write out the pros and cons of making such a decision. You have a home that is paid for, your 70, in good health, have social security and Medicare along with having a few friends you can trust. With your home being paid for, that shouldn't interfere with wanting to travel or have fun. Are you in a retirement community where a neighbor could keep an eye on the house if you travelled? Also, I would ask myself "do I want to sell my house just because of the memories it stirs up"? If that's the case, the "memories" will follow you no matter where you are.
Something that might be interesting to try is to see if one of your friends would be in a position/agreeable to have you stay with them for a week or two. If so, you could see what it would be like to be out of your home and in a different environment. Just a thought - it would be a way of testing the waters without making any commitment/changes too quickly.
Whatever you decide to do, please take your time so there are no regrets. There really are so many aspects to consider - ones that none of us can fully know.
I wish you comfort, peace and clarity in the days and months ahead of you!
Wait a year is the usual good advice, and you won’t be sitting on your hands while you wait! This is a practical and positive way forward. Best wishes, Margaret
Go to www.nelf.org and find a certified elder law attorney in your area. Most have fiduciaries on staff. They can be appointed as your personal representative in the event that you need one. You will get all of your wishes in writing and they will follow them to the extent possible.
We chose this route because we don't want any family members trying to second guess what we decided on when we were able to fully understand what we were doing and we are POAs for others and it is not something that we would put on anyone but a professional.
I think letting all the 1st time for everything go by before you make any huge life decisions, like selling your house is a good rule of thumb to let you find your balance and get over the shock and newness of change before implementing more changes. Use that year to plan and grieve and find out who you are and where you want to go from here. But you know you and what you can handle, so keeping a big house that requires lots of maintenance may not be something that you want to deal with, even for a year.
I recommend looking into a management company and seeing if renting your house out would be a better option. It typically costs 10 to 12% but they handle everything and send you a monthly payment. If you choose this route, be sure and make your renters provide insurance that names you as the insured and get a deposit large enough to cover your fire deductible and their coverage deductible, that way you are not out any money if they don't take care of the house.
You will find your way, great big warm hug!
There can be significant benefits to renting. OP can invest the proceeds from the sale of her home creating another income source. As a tenant, repairs and maintenance are a thing of the past.
No condo fees, no special levies.
I agree with Midkid58, buy something more manageable. Renting is just giving money away. 55+ community that has managed care attached? Spend this time doing research. And yes, go have a good time while you are still young.
How about thinking of selling and buying a much smaller condo where everything is covered. No more lawn care, etc. Neighbors closer by to lean on if necessary.
Renting is throwing money away each month. Owning is much better, financially, esp if later on you need to move to assisted living.
You should talk to friends or remaining family about establishing your will and appointing a POA for you--someone you REALLY trust, and a 2nd to that person.
At 70--and in good health---go for it. You can't really travel right now, so use this lockdown as a time to do "Swedish death cleaning' and emptying your house and your life of as much extraneous stuff as you can.
As far as I know, if you cannot take care of yourself and there is no POA, yes, the state takes over. I've never seen that go well.
Good Luck!