By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Not much detail for us to go on.
But.....tiger.....I sense a kindred spirit.
For all of her years, my mother only accepted people into her life if they catered to her neuroses and completely “bought” her reality. No exceptions for family.
As Mom’s only biological child, I was a lifelong pro at navigating Mom’s “soft ultimatums.” Everybody’s a little bit weird, right?? Live and let live....
Enter old age. As Mom’s needs increased, her inflexibility made it impossible for me (and others who were close) to provide productive, forward-thinking solutions.
To h*ll with POA and telling me where her important papers were and getting a diagnosis for her balance issues and looking into safer living arrangements — all Mom cared about was her strange priorities.
And all people on the outside saw was a daughter (me) who “didn’t go to her house often enough” and “never took her to church” and blah blah bla. They had no idea.
Much as I loved my mother, I had to draw the line at Shelter, Utilities, Food, Clothing. Those were needs. And they were met.
The figurative window dressing.....the “awwww” moments.....the looks-good-to-others Mother-Daughter tango..... not so much.
Hang in there, tiger. Take care of yourself.
The exception might arise if the specialist needs to discuss a treatment decision, though. Then, if the person can't handle that alone, he or she is going to need a representative with authority and you can't expect the staff to go so far.
Yes, Mom had a mass in her upper stomach. We went a a specialist that ended up feeling it was a thickening of the wall caused by GERD. Mom went every 6 months for a while then I requested once a year. Just in case of change. Another was for her Thyroid. We went until her numbers were normal. After that, I got paperwork for her tests and she only went in for the usual check in that was needed to get prescription renewed. She was going to her PCP every 2 months. I asked her why? Because he told her to come back. Really? Mom was only on Cholesterol and BP meds. I went with her the nxt appt and the nurse asked why she was there again (friend of the family). I told her I didn't know but if he asked why she was there, she would only be coming back if she was sick or needed refills. He asked why she was there.
I may go once with Mom and she better let me talk to the doctor. I would want to make sure this isn't just Mom playing you. If doctor doesn't give you a good reason why Mom is there, then don't pay for the transport.
I always feel I need to explain myself but you really don't owe the staff any explanations. Mom is their resident. She pays big money to live there. Tell them you are not available for personal reasons and your sanity. I know they have residents with no family. How do they manage for them when they have doctor appts?
Just say "no, I can't possibly do that".