By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or
[email protected] to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our
Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our
Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
You’ve written a beautiful and heartfelt post, and G-D will most certainly forgive you for having periodic human frustrations at the very difficult situation. I truly admire your positive outlook. I wish I could absorb some of that and apply it to how I feel. Maybe someday I’ll look back and see something positive about what I’ve been doing for my aunt for all these years. From what I can tell, she’s never noticed.
Hugs to you, JB
I'm sorry if you have felt that way
I like to simply reply "Yes". Accompanied with a fake smile 😁
Some elders use verbal sparring for entertainment, to relieve boredom. I once met an old lady like this.. a nurse asked if she needed help opening her banana. "It's not a banana" came the swift reply. Nurse says something like Oh my mistake. Do you need help opening that yellow piece of food?
Old lady says " It's a BANANA. Don't you KNOW what it is??"
🙄😭🤣
If you drink, you deserve to have your kids abandon you when you're old and infirm. Those drinks are actively contributing to your future dementia.
If you don't save up AT LEAST $250,000 (that's in addition to your social security checks) for assisted living, then you'll get put in a Medicaid bed next to some other coughing patient for God knows how many years. Don't expect to move in with a relative. That's cruel.
I'm wasting my time typing this. The people who need to read this aren't reading this.
Or a convenience to men.
What if you were another brother?
I'm so thankful for this community of caregivers sharing thoughts and suggestions!
The exasperating behaviors resulting from significant brain damage! Like grunting, groaning, yelling out for hours at a time, including overnight.
Fighting off any attempts to provide personal cares. So its always a battle.
And finally - family, friends and neighbors assume I have time to take care of their needs, because they assume I'm at home all day with nothing to do! They have no idea how drained I am, physically and emotionally, every day!
took my dad to buy a new belt last night at Macy's. It was a demeaning experience. I need time to recover just from that one "good deed".
Is this how he's always been, or is this just since he's had dementia?
Battleaxe is subtle. You are far too kind, IMHO
the word “ Caregiving “.
Sometimes it’s “ Assigned Servitude”.
It would be the first time I see real justice in my life.
I hate the word: Normal, that's normal. Ok cool that's normal how do we deal with it, we try and redirect, we try to be empathetic, what do we do with this?!
Tired of any conversation being a land mine whether it is us just trying to engage with her. Or others trying to engage with her, knowing or unknowing bringing up past things that is a major source of conflict. Constantly cringing waiting for the fight after others leave because they unknowingly created a conflict that we have tried so hard to avoid.
Sick of feeling guilty or made to feel guilty we know we have done our very best to provide the best of the best and make the best decisions possible. Yet there is nothing that will help her be happy or at the very least content.
Just as much as she didn't ask for Alzheimer with Dementia, we didn't ask to be abused!