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The previous manipulation techniques of shaming, guilt inducing, all that was hard, the this pleading is downright creepy and eerie.
As for the ring, I do like the just take the first quote advice. It was 200 for some process such like funkygrandma described of some kind, and as people say by the time you burn up gas one is not going to save much from that.
Either this is from dementia or it is not.
If this is from dementia there is ZERO to be done about it.
If it is a normal person you would say "If you do that pleading voice to me I will hang up at once" and that's what you do.
By doing the tasks she wishes done when she uses this pleading you are training her that indeed this DOES WORK WELL FOR HER.
Everything depends upon whether this is dementia or not. It certainly SOUNDS like dementia, but I am guessing.
Then I will tell you that there are several options for having a ring adjusted for someone with arthritis in their fingers or just with large knuckles.
A jeweler can put either sizing beads in the back of the shank(the ring would have to be sized up accordingly first)or they can put what is called an arthritic shank on her ring instead, which would allow her ring to open up from behind to allow it to get over her knuckle, and then close up to fit more securely at the base of the finger.
Both will be expensive as gold is at an all time high right now at over $2000 an ounce, so whichever route she goes it will not be cheap guaranteed. And the arthritic shank will be more expensive than the beads as there's more gold involved, but the arthritic shank is much more comfortable than the beads from what women have told me.
And yes I sold fine jewelry for over 18 years and I often had to help older women get there rings adjusted to fit over their large knuckles. It was expensive then(I left in 2016). I can't even imagine how much more it is today.
I wish you well in setting the much needed boundaries with your mom.
That begging and pleading behavior is definitely over the top. I would have a real hard time with it!
Best of luck.
The best part of my mother's ring sizing story was after she finally made The Decision of The Century, she insisted the jeweler had swapped out her diamond for a cubic zirconia! She repeated that absurd story from 1975 until 2022. 🙄
Stick to your guns, it's the right decision.
YOU aren't the horse's patootie here. Your time is precious and limited; your mom can take the facility bus if she wants to go elsewhere.