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My mom did the same to me and drove me mad. I had to save my sanity.
I ignored her questions.
I moved far from ear shot so I wouldn't hear her questions.
If I heard, I just grunted, nodded, said "uh huh", "yes", "yeah", "sure", or anyone word answer.
If she didn't like my replies, and started asking more and more, I just left the room.
You must remove yourself from this insanity. Or else, you will lose it mentally, your blood pressure will skyrock, you will resent your mother, even hate her. No, no, you don't want to go there.
Don't worry me about her being mad or disappointed, because she won't remember any of it later on.
She asks where my deceased brother is and I tell her he's gone home. That satisfies her with out breaking her heart again and again.
She asks where my deceased ex-husband is and when he's coming home (she's living with me in my home where he used to live) and I tell her he's in SC - (he's buried there).
She asks where my dad is and I tell her that I don't know.
She asks where her mother and her dad are and I tell her I don't know.
She asks if I've spoken to her mother today and I always say no.
She asks where my two young adult children are and I tell her where they are.
She asks what day it is and what time it is over and over and over and I tell her whatever comes to mind because it doesn't matter either way.
She asks me where I am and I tell her I'm "right here" and she usually says that I'm not me.
She asks where she is because she thinks she's "a patient" and I tell her she's at home.
I never try to recalibrate her because it just causes her stress and she then she's forgotten in five minutes anyway. The goal for me is to satisfy her that everyone is okay and she's okay.
It's just what it is. She's trying to get her mental bearings. It's sad.
Consider Memory Care placement if the caregiving becomes too much to bear. My mother did great in MC for the almost 3 years she was there.
Best of luck!
Not sure if you are familiar with the "Alexa Echo Dot" device but I think it might be of some help if your mom is open to the idea or able to comprehend and interact with it with some help. It is always there to answer as many questions your mom can come up with. Playing music she likes of any kind and so much more. If it helps her -- and you it would be worth it. She may think it's a lot of fun. My mom uses it a lot! I hope this may be something you are able to try out - even reading books to her. I am familiar with a lot of the difficulties for your mom and you and I really hope you find a bit of help and a lot of fun too. Take care
If you had kids, you went through the endless "Why? Why? Why?" phase, so you've been here before. You also know that was a phase that ended eventually, and this will, too.
The difference is that your children gained more language and could eventually express themselves more and carry on a conversation, but your mom will eventually stop talking and you'll miss her voice.
Can you broaden the questions into a conversation about your mother's memories of Carl when they were younger? Is there any particular preoccupation to do with him that she's returning to again and again?
I believe people suffering from Dementia eventually revert back to childhood. Someone asked my Mom one day how her kids were doing. Indignantly she told the person "I have no children" and I was standing right there. She had me at 21. So she was somewhere in time that she wasn't even married. The look on her face was like "why does this person think I would have children". She forgot my Dad long before this incident and believe me was someone you didn't forget.
I would ask her doctor about this and see if she can be given something to calm her a little.
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