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Shirley, if you are out there reading all of these comments, please let us know why you took your husband home from rehab/nursing care to begin with? How do you expect to care for him?
Maybe you should find a male caregiver to assist him with a shower. From what you have told us, you would not be physically able.
When it comes to Dementia, I remember you saying that white matter was found on the MRI. This means there is some Dementia. You should follow this up witha Neurologist.
There is nothing wrong with you coming here asking questions but you really need help for you. If you have any family, ask them to help you negotiate all that is going on. Maybe go with u when u go to the doctors and listen in. Help you find someone to ask this questions and help u get the answers.
You really need to call your office of aging. They may have resources you can take advantage of. You need some kind of support system.
You can also request that a physical therapist comes to your home to work with him on his balance. That should help him as well.
Only his doctor can answer whether or not he may have dementia. You may want to schedule an appointment with his neurologist. Best wishes.
Good luck.