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It sounds like your husband has the potential for violence toward you. No one should have to live in fear like you must be doing. Quite honestly, you cannot force him to wear incontinence briefs. If you have called them “diapers” to his face, he is resisting partly because diapers are for babies. What he is doing is not sanitary and since you’ve already slipped and fallen in a pee puddle, it’s downright dangerous. God forbid, but what would happen to him if you should become incapacitated?
Why do you think a social social worker would force his removal? Are there other things going on you didn't mention? Does his doctor feel he shouldn’t be at home? Maybe the doctor sees his potential for violence and is worried about your safety?
Tomorrow, call your local Area Agency on Aging and ask for help and advice.
Because of prostate issues and serious misjudgment about when and where to pee, we’ve been trying to encourage him to go in the Depends if he’s not sure he’ll make it to the toilet. We keep it light, and I’ve gotten in the habit of calling them “astronaut underwear.” However, when we had an incident where he had fallen in the toilet but had defecate. I couldn't get him off the floor, so I calmly said “it’s a diaper. Please use it. I’ll give you some privacy.
Since then, he’s been clear on the what and why. Mostly. We’re worried, too, and it’s disheartening. But trickery seems to be the way.
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