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long time in her old place. The room is immaculate without the constant urine stench and bed is made with clean fresh sheets. She is moved to comfy recliner several times during the day and not left in a wheelchair for 18 hours. Today, she was sitting on the screen porch enjoying the beautiful day with several residents and staff. I know I did the right thing even if she doesn’t understand.
Even though your mom has dementia, you can give yourself permission to not take the abuse.
You can make the visit short, and tell your mom that you won’t be talked to like that and will see her another day.
You must take care of your own sanity.
You matter, too!
If you have found another place you feel confident about, move her!
You made the right decision. This new facility sounds wonderful. Trust your judgement.
My mom would ask what I had done to her to leave her there, but then the next day would say she had been thinking to do the same thing for herself. Back and forth, back and forth, but she never called me names or wished me to die. So sorry you have to hear that. But then maybe you don't have to. Don't visit for a while.
She didn't quite understand what had happened but after the 1st day she was fine, forgot that she had moved.
I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. Good Luck!