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I am 82. If I want to eat an entire bag of Trader Joe's Original Potato Chips OR an ENTIRE box of ice cream sandwiches, that is up to ME.
PUH-LEEZE.
Am I not of an age? To decide WHAT I EAT and when? To decide how much?
Are you now the parent who will dole out the sweets?
Please kill me first.
I have to say, having thought long and hard on this one, having seem the "youngsters" now in their 60s trying to control our diets so we can live another 1/23 decade in misery? Why? What for?
l just ask you.
THINK ABOUT IT.
Please. I beg you. Please.
My LO shops, buys, serves own icecream in own home. So her biz too. At home.
However, when out at a regular function where moring tea was served to many, this became a situation that needed 'food policing'. My LO would sit next to the shared biscuit plate & keep eating with no impuse control. There was a young man with TBI that would do same. Staff would never be harsh but would manage this discretely by serving individual portions to these people, then moving the plate out of reach & view of them. Requests for more would need delay & distract tactics.
Let her eat what she wants. Why prolong her life?
I better not have either of my children tell me what I should or shouldn't be eating when I get older. Heck they better not try telling me now at my young age of 65.
One of the ladies in my caregiver support group whose mother lived to be 102, shares often how her mother who had Alzheimer's, lived on just ice-cream and cashews for the last 5 years of her life.
Now that is the kind of a diet that I want to be on the last 5 years of my life. I'm just saying.
In any event, buy pint size tubs of ice cream once a week and call it a day. If she cries for more, either deal with it or buy more.
Fwiw, I used to pray daily for God to take my mother who suffered from dementia. I'd bring her bags of chocolate and cookies at her Memory Care ALF because she loved sweets and had spent her whole life dieting. She ordered ice cream 2x a day, for lunch and dinner dessert. In her old age, she gained about 50 lbs. at least. So I bought her pretty clothes in bigger sizes.
I think she should still have her ice cream but whoever is the on-hands person providing her care can perhaps switch to ice cream bars or sandwiches so that she has a finite amount she can eat at a time (and hide the rest from her). Also consider frozen yogurt or non-dairy ones (there are some tasty ones out there). Would she eat a sundae? Like adding a fresh banana and nuts to one bowl a day?
More info would be helpful.
Is she going out still and buying it for herself? Not much you can do except try to counsel her about it.
If someone is enabling her, stop it. There's a few good suggestions here about limiting her without taking it away. She SHOULD be able to enjoy it if she wants. I love ice cream. If I was dying and someone took it away I'd probably throw my diaper against the wall until I got it back.
If she's declining quickly and you believe she's going to pass away relatively soon I'd just let her have it. Hospice will enter the scene eventually and none of the other issues will matter anyway.
Yes, I believe I would want my food restricted unless my checkout time was looming very near.
I know what it's like to have been morbidly obese. With mobility issues this is going to cause a lot more pain and suffering than a little dietary restriction.
I was a homecare worker for 25 years. Let me tell you thin people with mobility issues and incontinence who don't have dementia are hard enough to keep clean and dry. Even with the best and most frequent hygiene care they still get skin breakdown, fungal skin infections, incontinence sores, UTI's, and yeast infections.
Add obesity to the job and the odds of getting these conditions really increase and hygiene care becomes impossible in private residence. Many times size is rhe deciding factor of why a person gets placed in facility care versus being kept in their home.
So yes, I'd rather have calorie restriction and die in my beautiful home then be allowed to stuff myself with ice cream in a nursing home.