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Cattails
I am in my moms home 24/7. She has dementia, but that doesnt make it that easy either. She is very spoiled and i wait on her all day. The only thing that keeps me going is that the next stop is AL. We are seeing the attorney about the money arrangements next. Does your mom pay you? When we had a problem once about money, i told her i would have to quit and get a job to pay my bills. That worked pretty well. Can you get a dr to write a note saying you are taking on too much? I guess all that remains as jeannegibbs says is to appeal to her motherly attributes. If one of my girls sincerely or tearfully told me she couldnt do all the work, i would gladly get someone else. Gosh, the only things i can think of beside these are illegal LOL! I am tired too. Good luck to you. Thinking of you Tired. Hugs. tonio
Good luck,
The stress from 24/7 can cause you to develop stress induced health issues and you don't want that to happen, if it hasn't already. Hugs to you.
"Mother, I will not be doing the laundry and housecleaning here anymore. I will help you find a reliable homemaker to do those things."
"Mother, I can't be here more than 2 hours a day anymore. I will help you find an aid to come in some additional hours."
She'll say she doesn't want an aid or a homemaker. "But someone has to do those things, and it can no longer be me. Who is going to do your laundry when I stop, next month?"
Would bringing in an objective professional for Social Services to explain options to her help?
I am very sympathetic to your mother not wanting strangers in her house. It is very sad that she cannot have what she wants in that regard. It is sad that she cannot do her own laundry and cleaning and shopping and errands and on and on. But it is reality. And expecting you to do everything that she can no longer do is just not realistic.
I am putting this pretty harshly and I'm sure you would put it in sensitive, caring terms. But the bottom line is you cannot do 24/7 care and she needs 24/7 care. Some other arrangements have to be made.