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He's also called me my sister's name, and other people...It takes patience, but either calmly agree with them, or gently re-direct the conversation. It's hard sometimes I know. I'm the only caregiver for my dad, and when I'm so exhauseted and worn out, I have to admit I've yelled out once that I was his daughter, and he was my dad, and I couldn't marry him. I thought that would help, but then he says "why not?" HA!
It is great that you have a few hours every visit where Mother seems to be in the present and knows who you are. Cherish those hours and make the most of them. Reminisce about events from your childhood and younger years. Talk about what is going on in your life now. Relate the present to the past. For example, tell her about all the garden produce you canned last week and then talk about the first time you canned with her.
It is heartbreaking that your own mother doesn't know who you are. But you still know who she is, and your compassionate visits are a way of keeping the connection.
Another time she got really angry when we got off the phone after talking to my sister. (Mom doesn't much like talking on the phone anymore) Turns out she thought we were talking to her cousin by the same name and since we'd never known her, Mom couldn't understand why we had hogged the phone. We called my sis back and they talked for a bit. When Mom got off the phone she turned to me and said. "it's really hard to talk to someone you haven't talked to in years." My sis said she could tell Mom thought she was someone else but tried to give her some vague answers that fit. She said she didn't mind just hearing Mom to talk to her over the phone was enough..
But it does hurt at first when you know they don't know you as you. With time I have come to accept it. She still thinks of me as someone she loves and cherishes spending time with. That is enough.
Best of luck with it. My mom remembers almost nothing of her past and that is sad cause I have pictures here that I have no clue who they are and only some of them have names on them.
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