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What if this happened in the middle of the night?
At various times in our lives, we all have had to do scary things.
We were scared about our first job. If we didn’t work, we wouldn’t eat. But, we ending up loving being able to eat.
We were scared about our first date. But, we fell in love.
And, on and on it went, through life.
Just because something is hard, doesn’t mean it’s not the right thing to do.
Of course it would be easier if she would see the light and understand the danger she is putting herself in, but she is like a child in this regard. They don’t see the danger until too late.
Personally, I would lie my face off and call it a vacation that never ends. Because if they don’t see reason, it will be a never ending argument that never goes anywhere.
Sooner or later, you have to deal with reality - with how the way things are, as heartbreaking as it is. It’s not the way you want it, and that’s a good thing. That’s what makes you a good daughter, despite feeling s***** about everything. Because this isn’t the way you would choose for things to be.
But that doesn’t change the way things ARE. All you can do is what’s right for your mom. To keep her healthy and safe. That’s showing love.
"Yes, change like this is scary, Mom. We will be here to support you when you need that if there are any issues. But you can't live alone anymore".
We told her that because we weren't near enough to respond to her near-constant "emergencies", she needed to re-locate (we never said "move" and we never talked about selling the house) so that there would be folks on site to assist her.
Look, going to live in a facility is a little like starting Middle School. Will they like me? Will they be mean? Will I be the "dumb" one?
Find several facilities, take mom to visit. But re-locating at this point is no longer her choice.
Get her doctor to chime in, if necessary.