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Why are the treatment facilities refusing to take her in as a patient? Has she had a psych evaluation by a geriatric psychiatrist? I would insist on that before the hospital releases her! Something is going on besides just 'depression', it sounds like, as you've said. What sorts of tests have they run at the hospital? How did they arrive at a diagnosis of 'depression'..............? Based on what?
In any event, you can't save a person from herself, unfortunately. If it's TRULY your mother's wish to die, then nobody is going to prevent her from doing so. I turned 63 this past July, and just can't imagine feeling the way your mom does, or worse yet, putting my CHILDREN through what she's putting YOU thru. Tell her that. Let her know that what she's doing is very selfish and hurtful and it's making YOU sick to witness her going through this. Maybe, by some miracle, she will hear what you're saying and become willing to talk to you. To let you know what's going on inside her head. To give you some INSIGHT as to what's happening here.
I'm so sorry you are going through such a terrible ordeal. Sending you a big hug and a bunch of prayers for some kind of good resolution to this nightmare.
This is a treatable problem, and I think it's imperative she goes to a mental facility. Why would these facilities refuse to take her? It's what they're supposed to do.
I think something's really bothering her and it hasn't been identified, but that's obviously not an informed opinion, just insight.
However, you mentioned moments of clarity, then she's "gone again". It's not clear if she was diagnosed with a type of dementia.
Could you elaborate a bit more on her physical condition?
This is really distressing; I can understand how it can be so upsetting.
People will probably laugh at this, but I'm of the opinion that sometimes natural remedies are best. Does she respond to pets? Cat and dog therapy usually bring out something in people that meds can't. Flowers? Do they cheer her up?