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I am so glad she will be going to Memory Care by the end of the month.
My friends mothers behaviour is violent and she hit her grandchild for no reason not long ago. The saddest thing was aftwrwards the child that was hit was asked if he would be visiting his gran again soon and he replied - that isnt my gran!
She is quite nasty to my friend (her daughter). Its like she has chosen her to vent her anger and stress out onto her daughter. Maybe it is just that fear and anxiety (unless of course its mental health causing it) and maybe it can be addressed in another way - a different way of expressing things? Its not easy. I wasnt able to do it - my sister stepped in. My dad knows she means business and does what she says - she says it in a way that shows him a benefit as well - and softens things with afterwards we will do this or that? Its a scary time getting older.
Dealing with aggression is tough. I am very happy to hear that placement isn’t too far away.
Wishing you and your family all the best.
What is the plan for how to get Mom to leave her house and get her in the memory care building ?
that is good as it is soon
Have been following your posts, and it sounds like this placement is much needed
From what you have told us about her ongoing nothing this bad every occurred. Now with the tooth broken off and not addressed and her gobbling down pills I am worried for her. She could be in pain, have a UTI, really anything.
I am very very happy to hear she will enter MC sooner than expected. That's quite good news.
Hope you an fill us in on the medical story.
Been a nasty day here, and hope you get some rest, and hope she will be OK with this sudden turn for the worse.
The reply is down where it was being discussed that the dentist probably only could fit her in the early morning on short notice , which was the case according to Roger but , then they were nice and let Roger bring her later eventually .
I am happy for both of you that you will be back to being her daughter and advocate soon.
Prayers that the time and transition is an easy one for both of you.
Sure look forward to your updating us on how it's going for your Mom, Roger.
I have to tell you that this is life threatening.
Now it is not her decision for care, and because you already told us she has dementia this is kind of on you to get her care whether she wants it or not. That means you let 911 know about the broken tooth and your fear of sepsis with this new behavior (a very valid fear).
Teeth that break off expose the root and infection can quickly set in. There may be transfer then to the blood stream. Sepsis would mean that the organs quickly begin to shut down one at a time. It means death if not treated. My brother died from a miniscule tiny abrasion on his shin that didn't heal, and that he put ointments on, ignoring it. It was so small that, despite his wearing shorts all the time, NO ONE noticed it, yet it infected and the infection entered his blood stream. He died of it. In his case, he longed for death; he had little to look forward to at 85 other than the progression of his early Lewy's dementia.
But I am here to tell you that at this point your mother is at risk of death from something as simple as a fractured tooth.
She must get care.
Speak to her MD at the least today.
Unless you wish to let nature take its course and are willing to be responsible for that choice now your Mom no longer can be.
It's up to you really.
She’s 87 with dementia and her tooth fell out and she brushed her teeth and ate this morning . I gotta be honest , if she was having no pain or bleeding, I would have skipped the dentist , and waited until she either complained about pain or had trouble eating . Old people’s teeth fall out , the root shrinks , gums recede .
I think it is worth a try, and I wouldn't be above telling some pretty good fibs.
I think this is getting worse and worse and placement doesn't seem to be moving for Roger. Now this. If mom is having violent episodes she could have a bad UTI going on; I doubt you will cooperate with Urine C&S, or even be able to.
I hope she gets in for at least a check.
I would call EMS and say your mother "attacked" you and pushed you, nearly toppling you down the stairs. If that tooth is not just fallen out completely from the gum, but has broken off she could be getting septic, and infection, so tell them about the tooth and the plan for emergency dental gone wrong this a.m. Tell them she could have a UTI because this combativeness is "unlike her" and you are fearful something (even possibly a stroke) is going on.
In order to get EMS to take her in you are going to have to truly "ham this up" (sorry to be so blunt) because otherwise EMS will say "She doesn't want to go and she is competent and able to decide this on her own". You are going to have to say "Something dire is happening; this isn't my mom."
Yes, once there, don't take mom home. Tell them she needs full assessment by neuro-psyc and that you cannot handle her at home. Ask for Social Services. Tell them all you have been trying and tell them you want her placed; it's no longer safe at home. That will hopefully HOPEFULLY get the ball rolling.
Hope you'll update us and good luck.