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Grandma lived to be 93.
Don’t throw shade on me, lol but it worked.
Speak with her doctor first of course but it’s just a suggestion.
Dad kept passionately telling healthcare providers that Mom was on too much medication. No one listened to him, in fact, her medical records made no mention of his concerns, but stated Instead that he was ranting, and suffering from the beginnings of dementia (which was not true).
Take a look at all prescribed medications and supplements. Chart out medical purpose, negative side effects, dangerous interactions and proper dosages (for someone with your mother’s weight). You can start with the printouts provided by the pharmacy and augment your chart with information available online.
Mom was prescribed so many medications (incrementally slowly, most added during hospitalizations) that she could not function well. She had one of those pill boxes with many compartments and so many pills that the boxes could not even snap shut. She was waking at night ready to go out too. The sheer number of different medications were ridiculous and the dosages were only appropriate for a much larger person to begin with.
After refusals by several doctors (who told me I was in denial regarding the aging process) I found a doctor who was willing to listen to me regarding dad’s concerns and helped slowly wean mom down to dosages that were manageable for her body (which it turns out were lower than even what was recommended for her weight). Do not attempt weaning anyone off medication without a doctor’s supervision, as this could be very dangerous if not done correctly. It turned out that about 3 of Mom’s medications were not needed at all.
She completely bounced back! She felt so much better, sleep returned to normal cycles, she was happier, her memory sharpened, she stopped falling/regained balance, and even was able to exercise (and take fairly long walks) again. As Dad, at that time, was her primary caretaker too, his health and lifestyle improved significantly also.
A visiting nurse told me many of her other patients were in the same boat - when she told them our story and they were weaned, they also experienced a miracle.
I took my grandfather slowly but surely off all the drugs he was on...and replaced them with healthy foods & herbs. He smoked from 15 to 75 yoa, so his body is not ever going to be as good as someone who didn't...However, he rides his bicycle around the area, swims in summer & sleeps well at night. He does get depressed, & irrational, & imagine all sorts of things. And generally give me a hard time. I hang in their because he's my Grandpa, and I love him
However, he is for all intents & purposes a healthy man at 85
Watch "Death by Medicine" by Gary Null sometime on YT it is very enlightening
mom definitely needs to attend a adult day care for about 8 hours a day which will help with sleeping at night. Dad could sleep while she is there so by the time she gets back he would have had some rest. Melatonin is great but does not work for everyone. A hot totty is a good idea if she does not have other health issues or meds that alcohol would interact with. Be careful of meds that a doc may prescribe, it can do more harm than good. Doctors are not always correct. It’s not a one size fit all. Parents are very stubborn but you have to be more aggressive in making a decision. Good luck and we are here for you....
If you have the urge to try one of the "night time sleep aids" that contain the medication that is in Benedryl it is not without problems. The medication in benedryl can cause what I call a Foggy Brain. I tried it once and realized that I should stop giving it to my Husband. I figure if I woke up with a foggy brain what the heck is it doing to someone that already has dementia!
Check with her doctor, there are medications that can help. (keep in mind all medications come with a risk of side effects)
If possible keep her as active as possible during the day so she is tired and will be more apt to stay asleep.
Larger meal in the morning smallest meal at night might make it easier to sleep.
Limit liquids prior to going to bed. Eliminate stimulants before going to bed (anything with caffeine)
Try to eliminate the TV prior to going to bed, at least 30 minutes.
And maybe a sound machine of night time sounds, crickets might help.
By the way from what I have been told if there is light on it does limit the effectiveness of Melatonin so if a light is kept on for her that might also be contributing to the problem
Dr. Gave Gabapenten, made her so hyper & psychotic, trying to run away every day!
We got a bottle of Kava (herbal) pills 500mg, 2x/day. Stopped the Gabapenten. Now Mom is very calm and goes to bed by 9:30.
I feel your pain, sending hugs.
Its a down hill painful slide
With all due respect I offer the following..Kava can cause a little liver irritation if used consistently.
Sometimes is fine. However, its helpful to vary the herbs, and foods.
Teas are always helpful. Chamomile + Catnip is very helpful for restful long deep sleep
And Valerian caps. Additionally Magnesium Citrate 2.250mg before bed.
There's also magnesium fizzy powder called "Calm"
People seems to like the taste, the fizz & the effect.
Magnesium deficiency is very common in usa.
Make sure you have your dr check Mum's iron and b12. These deficiencies are very very common in the elderly. And these anemias interfere with sleep
Lastly, if you give herbs/supplements 6 days, rest sundays, then repeat you will get better results.
Your Mum is lucky to have such an intelligent aware daughter