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I know this has to be breaking your heart. The problem is, you mom is not able to be logical. She can’t understand why you are making changes. That being said, you do have to do some things such as make sure the stove "doesn't work," or whatever needs to be done for her safety.
Since you have to make so many changes to her home and living habits, she may be better off living in a good assisted living memory unit. That would be one big change but so is having her house changed as it is. Professionals would make sure she is safe and cared for and you could concentrate on having nice visits with her, taking her out if she enjoys that, and comforting her.
Even in a controlled environment she's likely to get angry with you at times. The only way you'll be able to cope with some peace of mind is to understand that she cannot help but feel anxious over change. Her environment doesn’t make much sense to her. She can't help this. Her brain is being destroyed by the disease.
You might want to get in touch with your local Alzheimer's organization and/or go to www.alz.org to learn more about the disease. The brain tour on this site is amazing.
Take care and please keep coming back here for support. Most of us have been in similar situations.
Carol
if you ask for peoples input i think you should be thankful for getting it instead of being so defensive. i too think your approach was simplistic. ill or not someone who " puts their foot down" with me is prob'ly gonna think theyve ran headlong into the battle of leningrad. the GD brick wont even be reusable. lol
So I know how it feels to try to get a parent to do what's in their own best interest and to be met with their active resistance. It sounds to me like you're doing a fantastic job. Hugs to you. You are not alone.
My FIL could not have lived alone. He would have wandered off. Do you have someone with her 24 hours a day?