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She may hate the idea of wearing the pads, or else she could have memory issues.
If her memory is okay, try letting her know that she has more independence if she wears protection, because she is more pleasant to be around. Try not to show blame or anger. Just be light and let her know that incontinence can happen to anyone.
If she has memory issues, then she isn't "forgetting" on purpose. She may not be connecting with why the pad is laying there for her. She sees it, but the reason doesn't register. This,she can't help, no matter how much you reason with her. Accompanying her is likely the only way to keep her wearing them.
This is tough. I'm sorry you are going through it. Maybe someone on the forum will have more tips.
Carol
I just keep reinforcing when she forgets. She thinks she remembers to put them on. It is probably she is half asleep??? I guess buy stock in Tide.
OR - this worked for a long time with my Mom - I told her THE DOCTOR SAID she was not to get up and go to the bathroom at night anymore, as her risk of faling and breaking her hip was too high. (Mom was more likely to pay attention to my instructions if I told her the doctor said for her to do something)
So we took a last bathroom trip before bedtime, and then the bathroom door was CLOSED and LOCKED until morning. I even put a chair in front of it! This cut down on my washing tremendously - and also kept me from the worry that Mom would fall in the middle of the night and i wouldn't find her til morning.