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APS has no way of knowing of your healthcare proxy, do they? Unless mom said " I'd like my daughter to be here. Please call her and let's set up a meeting" or, " let me get my daughter on speaker phone".
When an elder with dementia wanders, the person is a danger to himself. The state has the right and duty to step in and protect your father.
In most states, if there is a spouse in the home, it can't
be sold while the spouse lives in it, so your mother would have lifetimes rights to live there. But a lien would be placed by Medicaid to recoup payment for services.
Call APS for clarification. Did mom get a business card from the person who visited?
I would cooperate with them and ask for the help in getting more assistance for your parents.
What is your immediate plan for keeping dad from wandering, I.e. safe?
It is s best to cooperate with APS they are trying to help. Maybe mom is not able to provide the necessary care any longer. Do you live with them?